Some people believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #activities #time #pressure

It is often said that

youngsters

should do academic

activities

during their

pastime

however

,others would contend that

kids

should play during their

leisure

time

.In

this

essay,I intend to discuss both sides and give you my opinion.

Firstly

,the proponents of the

idea

that

youngsters

should do academic

activities

in their

pastime

claim that if children want to be successful in their future life,they should not waste their

leisure

time

by playing .

In other words

kids

should make the most of their

time

by focusing on the academic syllabus ,

for instance

,they should study scientific books or do scientific experiments .It is my belief that

this

idea

is not quite powerful and

this

approach would not only reduce the productivity of

youngsters

but

also

it would negatively affect their behaviour by increasing their stress levels.

Further

, the opponents of the

idea

that it is more beneficial to

youngsters

to spend their

leisure

time

by academic

activities

highlight the point that

kids

should play games in their

leisure

time

.It has proven that

kids

who play games and have more physical

activities

in their

pastime

are more likely to achieve higher goods in school.

Therefore

,they could be more successful in their future .

Further

,some studies which have been conducted at Harvard University indicate that

kids

who had more physical

activities

and playing in their

leisure

time

are far more unlikely to have mental problems in their long-term life.

Therefore

,they could be healthier and achieving higher goals in their life. It is my belief that

this

idea

is far more acceptable . In conclusion, it seems to me unreasonable for children to spend their

pastime

on academic

activities

due to health issues and it would be more logical to play and have physical

activities

because by that they can achieve more success in school and protect their mental health .

Submitted by dmaycry303 on Thu May 13 2021

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

302 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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