Unhealthy eating has a negative effect on both individuals and the society in which they live. Some people think that the government should tax unhealthy foods while others believe that a ‘fat tax’ is unfair and unnecessary. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#effect #individuals #society #people #government #tax #foods #‘fat #tax’

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Inappropriate

Correct article usage

An inappropriate

show examples

diet,

that is

Linking Words

full of unsaturated fats, sugar, and preservatives, is considered to be the main reason for many medical issues,

for

Linking Words

instance

Add the comma(s)

,instance

show examples

hypertension, diabetes, obesity, cancer, and others, that burden the health sector, community, and jeopardise one's life. It is considered by many that taxing junk

food

Use synonyms

will help to alleviate the problem, while others believe that

such

Linking Words

a practice is not just to others and not needed.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both views and will support the argument that

financial

Correct article usage

the financial

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penalty for fast

food

Use synonyms

is unacceptable.

one

Correct your spelling

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the one hand, it is argued by some that, if the government taxes people and unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

businesses, they will transform into more healthy options.

In other words

Linking Words

, individuals and society will avoid any extra financial burden and will opt into

tax free

Add a hyphen

tax-free

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easy

food

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

action will create an obstacle towards accessible and cheap

food

Use synonyms

option.

Furthermore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will play on psychology as well as announcing that there are fines on unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

will create public awareness that

this

Linking Words

is a wrong choice and should be abandoned.

On the other hand

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

is considered a choice by some and the freedom to choose should be granted in modern society. Forcing a population to divert into

certain

Add an article

a certain

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type of

food

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

may be

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maybe

Correct your spelling

may be

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unfair.

Also

Linking Words

, economically disadvantaged families find

the

Correct article usage

apply

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fast street

food

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a cheap source of

food

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to keep them fed when other "healthy" option can be very expensive to attain.

Moreover

Linking Words

, most modern age diseases are caused not only by diet but

also

Linking Words

sedentary

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a sedentary

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lifestyle, stress, and unawareness of healthy

food

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Therefore

Linking Words

, applying taxes may not address the causes of the problems and,

as a result

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, not just fail to solve the issue but may

also

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create more difficulties. In my opinion, fining fast

food

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although

Linking Words

holds good intention, is not an

evidence based

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evidence-based

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nor informed decision and should not be done. In conclusion, choosing the wrong diet is

Change the article

the

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main cause of most diseases,

however

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, a proper change in lifestyle and

food

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choice should come from the inside of an individual and not forced by taxes. particularly, by changing their habits following education and motivation.

Submitted by elhowati on Sat May 15 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

359 words

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Unhealthy eating has a negative effect on both individuals and the society in which they live. Some people think that the government should tax unhealthy foods while others believe that a ‘fat tax’ is unfair and unnecessary. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The best way to help developing countries is to give them financial aid. DO you agree or disagree with this statement. Suggest alternative to this policy.

You bought a piece of furniture from a store in another town recently.This is a problem with the item you bought

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that technology is now an invaluable study tool for young people. others, however, believe that it is harmful to the studying process.