IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people believe that modern inventions have brought more problems than the benefits. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons to your answer, and required examples

#people #inventions
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Due to the advancement of technology numerous technical
things
 are very prominent in human daily
life
. In these days technology inclining
day
 by
day
 people is fully dependent on the electrical
things
 which have not benefited for their health and as well as our environment. I disagree with
this
 notion because modern
inventions
 have more problematic rather than benefits, I will discuss my viewpoints in the posterior paragraphs. Admittedly, nowadays researchers are finding numerous gadgets which have very convenient for usage but for electrical
things
 many major issues are occurring in the global world
such
 as, its effects on the people health
such
 as cancer problems are surging
day
 by
day
. Individuals are fully dependent on the
inventions
 they do not want to perform anything with their hands.
For instance
, in past, most of the masses had done their households
work
 with their hands without used any
machines
 they lived long and healthy
life
.
However
, in the present
machines
 replace everything people are more lazy and unfit.
Moreover
, due to the technical ,
goods
Add a comma
,goods
show examples
 the unemployment rate is increased because
machines
 are working faster than humans so every employer prefers extra technical
goods
 in their office.
Furthermore
,
inventions
 of
goods
 impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the daily wages of an employee because
machines
 are always doing accurate
work
 but the human did mistakes in their
work
 so stress level merges in the human's
life
.
For example
, In the recent survey done by the Delhi ,university 80% of the top companies of world hired the very few employers of the
work
 because their whole
work
 depends on automatic
machines
. Only 20% are hired employees in their era. To conclude, problems of
goods
 outweigh the benefits because
inventions
 of technical invite very
things
 which have really bad impacts on human daily
life
.
Submitted by varinder on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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