In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries ,

people

Use synonyms

intend to have their own houses

instead

Linking Words

of living in the rented homes . In my view ,

this

Linking Words

idea would be as merit . In the following essay , the reason for being essential to have the owned house and why it is a positive point will be discussed . Increasing tranquillity and welfare is the power full of

people

Use synonyms

determination cause to purchase owned accommodation to live.

Moreover

Linking Words

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

and their house have some financial needs apparently the most necessary and heaviest expense is paying money to provide a home.

Also

Linking Words

, if

people

Use synonyms

do not have apartments , they will have to expend a considerable part of their incomes on renting

home

Correct article usage

a home

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

, providing other needs would be difficult .

For instance

Linking Words

, a child who lives in a place which his parents are ownership will have

opportunity

Correct article usage

the opportunity

show examples

to reach

Correct article usage

a more

show examples

desirable education by studying in better schools and uses the rich nutrients as his meals rather than a child who accommodates in a rental flat because a segment of his parents' salaries spend on hiring so services quality for

this

Linking Words

child will be declined .

Therefore

Linking Words

, families can not achieve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reasonable welfare unless they are

their houses ownership

Change to a genitive case

the ownership of their house

the ownership of their houses

show examples

Additionally

Linking Words

, having a positive view about owning a home is more beneficial than renting would be the fact that generally ,

public

Add an article

the public

a public

show examples

who hire apartment should change their living or region places every year because of hiring nature that will be boring and exhausting for them and their families .So , they are not satisfied with their situations .

For example

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

devices or tools are hurt or their space can not be designed according to their favourite as the result of staying in the hires rooms.

Consequently

Linking Words

, relocating homes regularly by renters reduces their satisfaction of

condition

Add an article

a condition

the condition

show examples

. In conclusion , in my view , buying a house has a positive influence on public life because the more owned homes

people

Use synonyms

have , the more satisfaction and tranquillity will be observed in

families

Add an article

a families

show examples

life .

z.noori347

May 19, 2021

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

350 words

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