Both poor and the rich find the accessibility into the university difficult. Do you agree or not?

#accessibility #university

Today's juveniles claim that accessibility

into

Change preposition

show examples

the university is difficult for everyone. In

this

essay, I will outline why I utterly disagree with

this

statement

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and explain why I consider

Correct pronoun usage

it more

show examples

complicated for some than for others.

To begin

with, rich individuals, indeed, are

completelly

Correct your spelling

completely

privileged, considering their education in private schools and other personal life aspects.

For instance

, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

social

Add an article

the social

show examples

class A and B students have both parents alive and together, and live in secure

neighborhoods

Change the spelling

neighbourhoods

show examples

. As a

further

matter, despite it might not influence

Change preposition

apply

show examples

in accessibility

Correct your spelling

inaccessibility

show examples

first

Add an article

the first

show examples

place, these factors determine directly

Change preposition

apply

show examples

how poor people act before studying. Due to family setbacks, the great majority of class C and D kids are off of school,

thus

, they will not even have the chance to compete with others to be in a college.

Furthermore

, those ones who were not born with favourable money conditions and, even though, want to accomplish higher education status, have to face a society prejudgement, because of their bank account, which affluent individuals do not have to experience. In Brazil,

for example

, for

each

Change the determiner

every

show examples

ten students already inside a private university, two have to resort to scholarships programs due to the lack of financial conditions to maintain the studying.

Moreover

, generally, unfortunate ones have to work aside with their courses to raise funds to pay the college bills, not studying exclusively as should happen.

Hence

, it shows that, in spite of the fact that

accessibility

Replace the word

access

show examples

to university might be hard for both rich and poor people, it is harder clearly for underprivileged ones. To sum up, it is harder for people who do not relish

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a high monetary status to enter

Correct your spelling

show examples

academy

Add an article

the academy

show examples

than

afortunate

Correct your spelling

fortunate

a fortunate

individuals.

Submitted by alexandretco on Mon May 24 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opionion.
There are some arguments when talking about travel world-wide. Some people think that foreign exhibitors should obey local rules and traits while others argue that seignior have to open with diverse culture. Despite argument against, I believe it is the responsibility of the host nations to provide accomodation, recognizing the value of cultural exchange.
4.5
band
More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?
Nowadays, the rate of migration is increasing rapidly. The amenities in cities caused huge population movements in there much more than before, hopping for people to make a superior life for themselves. This essay will discuss how difficult the civic life is for people in cities and things that government can do in order to provide a better urban life for everyone.
6
band
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give ur opinion.
Throughout the course of life, we encounter so many unpleasant circumstances, many of which are unavoidable. Some believe it is better to accept a bad circumstance as it is and be content with what we have. Meanwhile, others argue that we have to fight against these odds to come out of poverty or unsatisfactory jobs. Though both views have valid points, in my opinion, we have to stand up against most of the odds to live happily.
6.5
band
These days people spend more and more time at work and less time at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
The current working environment is a fast-paced and highly competitive one. Today, workers are asked to stay in the office more than ever. It is agreed that this trend should be reversed somehow. This essay will analyse the pros and cons of today's working markets and will suggest a solution for this issue.
8
band
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
In this contemporary era, a significant proportion of the masses is having personal trainers for tracking their diet and physical activities and side-lined getting involved in sports or performing yoga or Zumba. This essay will discuss the reasons behind this trend and my complete agreement that it is positive development extensively in the subsequent paragraphs.

Both poor and the rich find the accessibility into the university difficult. Do you agree or not?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opionion.

More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give ur opinion.

These days people spend more and more time at work and less time at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?