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Band 6.5

Government should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree.

#government #money #education #recreation #sports
Appropriate utilization of state funds has always been a heated debate among the people. Some believe that these funds should be allocated towards improving the literacy of its citizens, while, others argue that
Correct your spelling
extracurricular
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extra curricular
Correct your spelling
extracurricular
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 activities
also
 should be given equal importance
besides
, education. In my opinion, both are equally important for the development of youngsters
hence
, the authorities need to focus equally on both aspects.
To begin
 with, recreational activities are very essential for mental health. As the famous saying goes, "All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy" applies to
this
 situation. The current academic standards are very high, in
this
 case,
sports
 and other exercises and prove a method of stress reliever for young kids.
Furthermore
,
Correct your spelling
extracurricular
show examples
extra curricular
Correct your spelling
extracurricular
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 activities can boost the creativity aspect of the human brain which is very important.
For example
, students who are naturally talented in arts and craft will get an opportunity to showcase their talents rather than being undiscovered.
On the other hand
,
Sports
 are useful for maintaining fitness for these students. With the present hectic lifestyle and low nutritious food, people face various health problems like obesity.
Additionally
, it
also
 develops a sense of discipline within the children.
For instance
, teenagers who regularly go for
sports
 training and practices develop a routine over a period of time. These efforts, in a long run, would have a positive effect on the child's lifestyle. Based on the points mentioned above, I strongly believe that recreation and
sports
 should be given the same value as education, bearing in mind, the benefits it gives the children.
Submitted by roshan.rebello22 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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