IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Nowadays television and the Internet have a greater influence on children's behavior than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#television #internet #influence #children #behavior #parents
People
 have different views about whether
parents
 still have a predominant influence on
children
 these days.
Although
 I agree that modern technologies have a
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 effect on young
people
's actions, I believe that
parents
 still play the most important role in shaping their kids' behaviour. On the one hand, the appearance of television and the Internet makes it possible for students to know new information and other values in the world. There is an increasing number of TV programs, online games aiming at delivering various types of knowledge and entertainment which are readily accessible to
children
, and some of them are even designed for youngsters. It is not hard to imagine that these shows may have an effect, no matter positive or negative, on
children
's attitude towards the world and
therefore
 the actions they take.
For example
, some young
people
 may feel relentless about victims of a murder and they may even be inspired to commit murder if they watch too many films depicting murders and violence.
On the other hand
,
parents
 are the
people
 who spend the longest time with their kids.
Children
 tend to copy what they see and hear from their
parents
,
therefore
 they are still mainly influenced by their family members.
For instance
, a child will understand the importance of reading if his or her mom and dad spend at least 30 minutes on books every day.
Moreover
, the time that youngsters watch TV or play online games is still under the control of their
parents
, which means that
parents
 could adjust how much their
children
's behaviour is affected by those advanced technologies. To summarize, we have to admit that modern developments
such
 as TV and the Internet have a greater influence on young
people
 than they used to, but
parents
 are still the
people
 who actually guide the direction of
children
's behaviour.
Submitted by 454275556 on

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