When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays the

technology

is more evident now more than ever due to the breakthrough of the internet. There are people connected all the time, but

also

there are people not so familiar with the

technology

. On one hand, countries and governments try to follow the

technology

to improve and modernize our

society

, but

on the other hand

, they avoid loss of all traditions and history origin, to preserve the identity of the place. In

this

essay, I will examine both sides of the topic, as well as give my opinion.

First

of all, even

Add a comma

,more

show examples

the

technology

increases in our

society

Technology

is present in the daily ground, in work and in studies and can have advantages and disadvantages, because of

this

, we need to

learn

Add the particle

tolearn

show examples

control its. Some people believe

that is

pointless

keep

Fix the infinitive

to keep

show examples

the traditions and history,

what

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

would be

Remove the article

apply

show examples

unnecessary work.

However

, knowing about the past is important to make a better future. Creating a modern

society

, without past features, is the same that to kill all efforts and fight of our ancestries. We would be not only wasting the time but

also

wasting the previous knowledge. I agree with idea

that is

possible to keep the traditions in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

modern

society

. A great example of

this

are

Change the verb form

show examples

the diseases. Knowing about diseases and

Change the pronoun

their

show examples

them

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

in the past can help the researchers produce medicines and vaccines in the present and the future with more accuracy. Facing the unknown without knowing some points is more complicated than live together controlling the risks. In conclusion, is much better to try to live with both sides than to live without an important part of history. Keeping both points can be more difficult,

however

, enable better choices.

Submitted by larissafelipin on Thu Jun 03 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Technological advancement
Efficiency
Global connectivity
Cultural identity
Diversity
Innovation
Coexist
Sustainable
Eco-friendly
Energy-intensive
Practical skills
Self-sufficiency
Homogenize
Preservation
Global diversity

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When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Fewer and fewer people walk on a daily basis. What are the reasons and how to encourage them to spend their time walking?

Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Improvement in health, education, and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping poorer nations in these areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, most people try to balance between work and other part of lives, Unfortunately, not many achive this balance. What are the problems of this? Suggest some solutions to solve the problems?