People should choose their course of study not on the basis of their own interests, but based on the kinds of jobs they can get. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #course #study #basis #interests #kinds #jobs

Choosing a

career

is vital in

this

society, and

Replace the word

most

show examples

mostly

Correct your spelling

most

show examples

people are

counfused

Correct your spelling

confused

what

Change preposition

about what

show examples

study

and what field they should go with.

This

essay is going to argue that

Correct your spelling

whether

show examples

wether

Correct your spelling

whether

show examples

people should opt for the

study

focusing on the field of

job

or according to their appeal of subjects. I personally believe

both

factors

are need

Change the verb form

need

show examples

considered

Change the form of the verb

consider

show examples

when

its

Correct your spelling

it's

show examples

the question of your

career

. If someone

look

Change the verb form

looks

show examples

ahead according to their

their

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

liking of subjects,

Ihave

Correct your spelling

I have

seen people are performing

excellent

Change the adjective

excellently

show examples

Study

Add an article

The study

show examples

is not easy

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

this

highest competition era, they need to get

highest

Correct article usage

the highest

show examples

marks in academics to get recruit by multinational companies.

This

is only

possilbe

Correct your spelling

possible

if we are studying what we like to

study

otherwise

Add a comma

,otherwise

show examples

the future will be boring.

For instance

, one of my

friend

Change to a plural noun

friends

show examples

was interested in music subject, there was a high risk but after some years now he is one of the known

musician

Change to a plural noun

musicians

show examples

and

get

Change the verb form

gets

show examples

highly paid even more than the doctors and engineers.

On the other hand

, if we choose academics according to the

job

we get, we make our future more safe and secure,

ofcourse

Correct your spelling

of course

we dream

Change preposition

of the

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

job

which is highly paid and secure

specialy

Correct your spelling

speciality

specially

achieveable

Correct your spelling

achievable

. Indeed, there is less risk of failure and more chances to get the desired

job

For example

, most of my friends did engineering

although

they were not interested in it

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

still they got

job

immidietly

Correct your spelling

immediately

after graduation,

although

it was not highly paid

initially

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

they are getting a raise every year.

Hence

they have a secured

career

Although

this

essay discussed

both

the points

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

both

are having

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

pros and cons. I believe

both

factors are equally important and need to be considered when choosing your

career

. If we have

Change the article

the

show examples

desired

job

in mind and good interest in the qualification of that

job

will be

cherry

Correct article usage

a cherry

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

cake.

Submitted by pinderkalsi95 on Fri Jun 04 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

312 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
n some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The phenomenon of generation is concerned with young society and aged people. It is apparent that both demographics posses significance, albeit in distinct ways.
<4
band
plastic shopping bags contribute to the pollution of air and sea. Some people think they should be banned. Do you agree or disagree ?
The illustrations present information about types of crimes and the relationship between age and crime in the UK for the last year. The overall trend shown in the data is that 80 tens of thousands crime accidents were committed by young people at the age of 20. The majority of humans preferred violent crimes.
5
band
Many doctors say that people in today’s world do not do enough physical exercise .what do you think are the causes of this ? what solutions are there to this problem ?
Some doctors have alleged that humans' physical activities are not adequate ,nowadays.However,in my point of view,some radices can be considered regarding this issue,which is uttered in the essay.As well,some remedial ideas are explained to iron out this phenomenon.
5.5
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages ?
Some professionals argue that learning a foreign language at primary school is better compared to secondary seminary. This trend has both merits and demerits. I believe that despite having a few drawbacks, it has been beneficial in numerous ways for students.
6
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There are some people, especially professional workers, who settle abroad after graduation, while there is an argument that it is their responsibility to work at where they complete their education. I personally think that the former one may be more sensible. In this essay, I will give explanations for both standpoints and my position.

People should choose their course of study not on the basis of their own interests, but based on the kinds of jobs they can get. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

n some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

plastic shopping bags contribute to the pollution of air and sea. Some people think they should be banned. Do you agree or disagree ?

Many doctors say that people in today’s world do not do enough physical exercise .what do you think are the causes of this ? what solutions are there to this problem ?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages ?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.