IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some children receive almost no encouragement from their parents regarding their performance at school, while others received too much pressure from there over enthusiastic parents which can have a negative impact on the child. Why do you think parents put too much pressure on the children to perform well at school? What do you think the role of a parent should be in their child’s education?

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While there are some
parents
Use synonyms
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
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 not show any interest in their
kids
Change to a genitive case
kid's
kids'
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 educational progress at
school
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, there are others who are over caring
to
Change preposition
for
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 the extinct that could reflect badly on their
children
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 type of
parents
Use synonyms
 puts high stress on their youngsters because probably they have had
bad
Add an article
a bad
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 experience back when they were students.
Parents
Use synonyms
role
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 in the education of their
children
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 must be a supervisory and supportive
role
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 that completes the
role
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 of the
school
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 which is to teach and educate. As it is known, fathers and mothers always want the best for their
children
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, and they do their best to fulfil their needs, especially for the things that they could not get or fulfil when they were younger.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they will push hard on their kids to drive them to do their best, especially in their studies, so that they can guarantee a good higher education and
therefore
Linking Words
 a good career that pays well and satisfies their needs.
For example
Linking Words
, one of my classmates who was lazy at
school
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 and did not make it to the university,
he
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
struggled to find a job that pays his rent and family expenses, so he pushes his
children
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 to focus and do their best at class so that they do not face the problems he is facing now. To be honest, I think the
role
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 of
parents
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 in pupil’s education is vital and it is to complete the
role
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 of teachers. Teachers
educate
Change the form of the verb
educated
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 in class and
parents
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 follow up at home.
Parents
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 must be monitoring their
children
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 behaviour inside and outside
school
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. Not only that, but they must make sure that they are doing their homework on time and help them finishing them if needed. To conclude, there are
parents
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 who stress their kids to highly perform in their studies to have
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 future, while there are others who are careless.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
parents
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role
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 in the educational progress of the students is vital and completes the
role
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 of the teachers.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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