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Band 4

There should be laws to control the amount and type of violence shown on television programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

#laws #control #amount #type #violence #television #programs
It is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 well-known fact that
people
 become what they see. Nowadays, the
content
 of
television
programs
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 shifted to more of action and
violence
 genre from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
family friendly
Add a hyphen
family-friendly
show examples
programs
.
Consequently
,
this
 has resulted in having a negative impact on the overall society
therefore
, there is an urgent need of regulating the
violence
Replace the word
violent
show examples
content
 on
television
programs
.
To begin
 with, when children are constantly exposed to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
programs
 showing
violence
 it adversely affects their mentality. They start getting angry and irritated on petty issues. Even adults are not spared
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the disadvantages of violent
content
. In some
television
programs
 when
violence
 is shown in the form of domestic
violence
 it drastically affects the overall society because sometimes it eventually happens in the real world as well.
Further
, as
people
 become short-tempered it indirectly results in an increase in crime rate as
people
 are unable to control their emotions and
therefore
, get into fights.
On the contrary
, a small amount of
violence
 is necessary
in
Change the preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
television
programs
 for the awareness of
people
. These are a few shows that portray
violence
 and
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 after-effects to aware
people
 of the ways to deal with it.
Therefore
, some practical knowledge is prominent. In my opinion, the government should take measures to maintain a certain level of the
content
 and the level of
violence
 shown on
television
programs
. It should formulate laws to regularise the type and amount of violent
content
 so that
people
 do not transform into criminals or are unable to deal with their anger problems. To sum up, the officials and the society should come together to promote friendly and knowledgeable
content
 on
television
programs
.
Submitted by harsimrankaur2400 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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