IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

many government think economic progress is their most important goal. some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. discuss both view and give your opinion.

#government #progress #people #country
Economic plays an important part in our life, so many
government
Change to a plural noun
governments
show examples
 think to make a progress
whith
Correct your spelling
with
which
 the economic’s goal, while some
people
 argue that there are many types of progress has
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
velue
Correct your spelling
value
 of importance for the
country
. I
definietly
Correct your spelling
definitely
 agree with the
fisrt
Correct your spelling
first
 statement about we have to increase our
economic’s
Replace the word
economy’s
show examples
 goal which has a huge impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our life. Economic has a big
roll
Correct your spelling
role
show examples
 in a
country
,
economy
Add an article
the economy
an economy
show examples
 can
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
 a
country
 has many resources and build
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
construction
Change to a plural noun
constructions
show examples
.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 the condition of
Economy
 in a
country
 will invite many investors for
other
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
country
 to invest their money for a big contribution to develop a
country
.
Besides
people
 usually think that
economy
 has the
first
 major problem for society in a
country
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 example,
people
 who don’t have much money usually think to do crimes like thief or robbery to get more money.
Instead
 to get investors from
other
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
country
 to build
country’s
Correct article usage
the country’s
show examples
development
. Government can make a huge impact
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 growing
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of citizens to invest in
stocks
Correct article usage
the stocks
show examples
 market of that
country
 to build a
country
.
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 some
people
 argue that
economic
Replace the word
economics
show examples
 is not the biggest program to develop a
country
, some
people
 looking for many aspects that can build a
country
 has
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
amazing progress. One of the
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions
show examples
 to
buld
Correct your spelling
build
 a
country’s
development
 is
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
educations.
People
 in the
country
 which has a great background from their education has a great
roll
Correct your spelling
role
show examples
 in their society’s life.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
people
 who take
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
education from the best university in the world will
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a bigger implication like make a company who can build
society
Add an article
a society
show examples
 in a
country
 has
better
Add an article
the better
show examples
 ability and
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
skill to
faced
Change the form of the verb
face
show examples
 the problem,
onthe
Correct your spelling
on the
 other hand
people
 who take
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
education from a usual university only think to become a worker in a big company or just become
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 usual
entrepreuners
Correct your spelling
entrepreneurs
. To sum up,
Economy
Correct article usage
the Economy
show examples
 has a major impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
country’s
Correct article usage
a country’s
show examples
development
,
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 will makes
country
 become richer than before if a
country
 has
much investor
Change the quantifier
many investors
show examples
 to build a
country
 better, in
fact
Add the comma(s)
,fact
show examples
 governments
also
 can’t blind
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 factor that can build a
country’s
development
. Like
educations
Correct article usage
the educations
show examples
 of their society.
Submitted by auzanghiffari on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • gross domestic product (GDP)
  • socio-economic development
  • quality of life
  • stakeholder
  • sustainable development
  • public sector
  • non-governmental organization (NGO)
  • civic engagement
  • green technology
  • quality of education
  • universal healthcare
  • cultural integrity
  • global competitiveness
  • human capital
  • innovation ecosystem
What to do next:
Look at other essays: