You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. In many parts of the world today there is a profitable market for products which lighten or whiten people's skin. Outline the reasons for using such products and discuss what effects they have in terms of health and society. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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It is true that nowadays
people
pay more attention to their self-regulation,
in particular
, they put emphasis on the colour of their
skin
. Towards
this
issue,
people
who stand on different grounds will give completely different views.
Whereas
, I will analyze
this
situation from many aspects as follows.
To begin
with, there are several reasons why more and more
people
choose to turn their
skin
into white.
Firstly
, It may be the change of aesthetic concept and can be attributed to a vast array of television programmes. The characters in it are all extremely white and thin,
then
from a long time influences, white and thin are the judgements of the beauty of a person will leave a foundation in their mind.
Secondly
,
people
live a better life than in the past. The more money they earn, the more chances of investing themselves they will get. Only because they gain much more income, do they have the power to do things they like, especially take care of their
skin
.
Then
I would like to share a number of effects that
this
issue will bring with it. The first one may be its impact on
people
's health.
This
technology has developed in recent years,
in other words
, nobody can ensure if it will benefit
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
or not
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
harm
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them. Actually, it is not mature.
Besides
,
this
product does not like any other things just stays on the surface of your
skin
, it is more like vaccination and
finally
goes into your body. There exist risks. The second one is for society. Admittedly, exaggerating the usage of these white products may lead to a terrible atmosphere in daily life, what
people
really need to pursue is normal healthy beauty. In conclusion, for
this
product,
people
should see it from many perspectives and make the right choice.
Submitted by ysh424 on

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Introduction and Conclusion
Ensure that your introduction provides a clear background to the topic and presents a clear thesis statement reflecting your position or the direction of your argument. Your conclusion should effectively summarize the main points discussed.
Logical Structure and Paragraphing
Develop your main points with more defined structure, ensuring that each paragraph discusses a single main idea related to the topic. The transitions between paragraphs should be smoother to guide the reader through your argument.
Supporting Details and Examples
Include more specific and varied examples to support your points. If personal examples are lacking, hypothetical scenarios or references to studies can be effective. Ensure that each main point made is well explained and tied back to your thesis.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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