Throughout the history, people have dream art of living in a perfect society, but they have not agreed on what an ideal society would be like. What do you think is the most important element of a perfect society in the modern world. How can people work towards achieving an ideal society?

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Most people in the modern world have a dream to live in an ideal society and lead a happy and meaningful life.

However

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, they do not have the same idea about what

the

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perfect society would look like. I personally think that there are three elements that can measure the perfection of a state in the modern world

such

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as social value, proper framework and employment opportunity.

This

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essay discusses these factors and the ways to achieve that ideal association followed by examples.

Firstly

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, social value and social bonding

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

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the most important

aspect

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aspects

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Remove the article

apply

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perfect development. A civilization where folks have strong

bonding

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bonds

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and obey

the

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apply

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social norms

tend

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tends

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to lead a better life. company is formed with many families. If the family members have a close relationship, they would form a better development. A perfect company must have a crowd with human quality and good social behaviours.

Secondly

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, having a good framework and business can be one of the requirements of a perfect civilization. The crowd need the framework and public business to fulfil their necessity.

For example

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, Melbourne

city

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City

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has so many modern infrastructures

such

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as public health

centre

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centres

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airport

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airports

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school

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schools

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, local government

office

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offices

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and

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apply

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etc. These services can lead to the population

pay

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paying

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tax

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taxes

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regularly and

obey

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obeying

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the rules

also

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. The tax payment becomes a resource to build good and complete facilities for the nation.

Furthermore

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, if the community obeys the

regulation

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regulations

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, they will not have problems with the business of the public.

Thirdly

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, an ideal company needs sufficient job fields to work in.

public

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The public

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can fulfil their needs by having a good salary

from

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for

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their task and

have

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having

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a good career in the future.

For example

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, folks in Los

angles

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Angeles

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spend most of their work and have a good financial condition.

As a result

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, they can be an entrepreneur. By being an entrepreneur, they can create new task fields for others and reduce the number of unemployed crowds. In conclusion, a perfect nation has to have good

infrastructures

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infrastructure

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and services

as well as

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sufficient job

vacancy

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vacancies

show examples

Then

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this

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situation can be built by paying lavy, obeying the policy, and creating the

work-fields

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work fields

show examples

by entrepreneurs.

reanudeepanWed Jun 16 2021

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Task Achievement

The introduction could be improved by clearly stating your main argument more directly. It's also beneficial to outline the main points that will be discussed in more detail.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that paragraphs are well-structured, each with a clear main idea and supporting details. Consider using transition words to guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.

Task Achievement

Include a wider variety of examples to illustrate your points, as some statements could be further developed to enhance clarity and depth.

Task Achievement

You have identified important elements of a perfect society, which is a thoughtful approach to the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a logical sequence, moving from one idea to the next, which makes it easier to follow your argument.

12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

360 words

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Throughout the history, people have dream art of living in a perfect society, but they have not agreed on what an ideal society would be like. What do you think is the most important element of a perfect society in the modern world. How can people work towards achieving an ideal society?

Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games. What are the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children?

In the last century when a human astronaut first arrived on the Moon he said: "It is a big step for mankind". But some people think it makes little difference to our daily life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that in modern society individuals are becoming more dependent on each other, while others say that individuals are becoming more independent of each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Public transportation could be made free of charge.Are there more advantages or disadvantages to this change.