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Writing Samples
Band 5

'We have an expression: food is not love'. Obesity these days is very common in our society. Some people believe our overeating habit and less physical exercise have left obese people to suffer from various illnesses. Discuss the solutions to remain fit.

#expression #food #love #obesity #society #people #habit #exercise #illnesses
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Obesity is a complex disease involving an excessive amount of body fat. It is a medical problem that increases the risk of other diseases like- blood pressure, sugar, heart problems, and cancer. In
this
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 essay, I would like to enlighten my views on the given subject.
First
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 and Foremost, obesity is caused by the consumption of excessive amounts of junk food. In the past, people did not have much variety of foods. They rely more on homemade food but today there are numerous options in the market
such
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 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 Pizza, Burger, Pasta and a number of more. People love the utilization of these meals and knowingly, the fact which is compounded by a higher level of fats and sugar which makes them obese. Another
,
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reason
Add an article
the reason
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 is the lack of exercises and spending too much time each
day
Use synonyms
 sitting,
such
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 as watching television, playing video games, and sometimes extended working hours are the causes for gaining weight. There are several solutions to prevent obesity. What is vital to achieving
this
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 target is self-discipline towards eating patterns and resolution to form a diet and fitness regime every
day
Use synonyms
 by consuming organic foods.
In addition
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 to
this
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, try to reduce the amount of inactivity by cutting out hours spent on the internet and use
this
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 time
in
Change preposition
for
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 physical activities. To conclude, it is true that
a
Correct article usage
the
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 number of obese people
is
Change the verb form
are
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 rising
day
Use synonyms
 by
day
Use synonyms
 which is a problem for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society and it can tackle only by making appropriate exercises and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
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 balanced diet.
Submitted by niksmd1991 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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