IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies. Some people believe that rich countries are stealing from poor countries. How far dp you agree woth the statement.

#people #countries #vacancies #dp #woth
Many public from
poor
Add an article
the poor
a poor
show examples
 community with higher education prefer to migrate to developed rich countries due to many facts .
Firstly
,rich state lure
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 from poor
society
 by offering handsome salaries. So that, one could dream to develop their status of living financially.
Secondly
,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 of higher education feels to migrate from their native
society
 to develop their skills of knowledge and broaden their
education
Replace the word
educational
show examples
 horizons. As poor
region
 are unable to provide all developed facilities which could hamper their voracity of development. It doesn’t imply that rich
society
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 stealing from
poor
Add an article
the poor
show examples
region
. Because they are encouraging
Correct article usage
the
show examples
community’s ability by offering many facilities to develop them to rose in their standards. It
also
 doesn’t make any sense to ask rich land to pay for calling
society
 from
poor
Add an article
the poor
show examples
region
.
Instead
, the govt of
poor
Add an article
the poor
show examples
region
 should encourage their ingenious community to stay and give their sophisticated services to
native
Correct article usage
the native
show examples
 country by focusing more on
developing
Correct article usage
the developing
show examples
 country financially and as well as technologically. The rich community could
also
 help poor
society
 to develop by organizing their own companies in the country or investing in
business
Add an article
a business
the business
show examples
 with them.
Submitted by Naaz on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: