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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many government spend a lot of money on art. Some people think this investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction
In the contemporary world, many states have provided financial plans for art
development
Use synonyms
 for decades to nurture the new generation. Some people agree with the plan,
while
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 others suggest the budgets should be spent on
health
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 and
education
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. I stand for both views of supporting children's
development
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 to bring up their
development
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 globally.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, there are two major reasons that some federal governments tend to have a financial plan for arts for students.
First,
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mural painting is more likely to be a tourist attraction to contribute economy.
For instance
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,
such
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 as Melbourne, tourists need to take photos from street lanes or mural painting, these art places can attract a large number of travellers per year.
Second,
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in my city, Hong Kong, some state schools have promoted their images when they encourage their learners to do some oil artwork on the walls of the school and earn a better appearance.
Therefore
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, the federal governments are more likely to provide some budgets for the arts.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, one of the majority spending money on
health
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 and
education
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 is to have basic skills and
health
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 are more essential in their lives.
For example
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, some undeveloped nations like Pakistan, have a large number of children who do not have a good medical system, and they can not experience school life as a financial issue.
For
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this
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 reason, the states should tend to supply the budgets for
health
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 and
education
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 as if the nation has an appealing educational progress and medical system, it will be beneficial to the countries.
Conclusion
In conclusion, based on the statement above, I believe that the public authorities should put a deal of effort into art and
health
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 and
education
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development
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 to raise children's global
development
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.

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Introduction
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the structure of your essay; restate the topic in your own words for a clear introduction.
Conclusion
Your conclusion should summarise the points discussed and clearly state your own opinion, providing a clear end to the discussion.
Logical Structure
Use cohesive devices to better link ideas and paragraphs, ensuring smooth transitions and clarity of arguments.
Supported Main Points
Develop main points fully with explanations, examples, and reasons to support your arguments more comprehensively.
Complete Response
Your essay should fully address all parts of the task with a clear and direct response to the prompt given.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Ensure the ideas presented are clear, well thought out, and exhibit depth of analysis and understanding.
Relevant Specific Examples
Use specific and relevant examples to back up your arguments. Draw from a wide range of sources to demonstrate a well-rounded understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural legacy
  • nation's history and identity
  • fosters creativity
  • economic benefits
  • tourism
  • art markets
  • quality of life
  • cultural understanding
  • productive population
  • personal and economic growth
  • fundamental for long-term development
  • well-being
  • immediate tangible benefits
  • abstract benefits
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