IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many governments spend a lot of money on art. Some people think this investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #money #art #people #investment #health #education
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In
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contemporary
contaporary
Correct article usage
the contaporary
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 era, it generally accepted that
art
Use synonyms
enrich
Change the verb form
enriches
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society and plays a valuable role in culture and
history
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.
Although
Linking Words
 to promote the artistic
orgnaizations
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organizations
,
art
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galaries
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galleries
, and other
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art related
Add a hyphen
art-related
show examples
 matters government
investe
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invest
invested
 big amount of
money
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 on it, others believe that hard cash should be invested on public service and
good
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a good
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 cause. In my
opine
Replace the word
opinion
show examples
 spending
money
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 on
exelerating
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accelerating
exhilarating
 medical and educational needs is more important than
art
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. There are two main reasons why people think
spend
Add the particle
to spend
show examples
money
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 on artwork is
essentional
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essential
.
First
Linking Words
 and
formost
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foremost
for most
, it
represent
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represents
show examples
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
show examples
 and
history
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 of the society. As artist keep
alive
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an alive
the alive
show examples
Use synonyms
history
Correct article usage
the history
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 of the
soceity
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society
 in their
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
artwork
show examples
art work
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artwork
show examples
, it’s essential to spend
money
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 on it so that they not only keep motivated but
also
Linking Words
encurage
Correct your spelling
encourage
 new artist.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, in
techno
Correct article usage
the techno
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 world everything would be possible with technology including
art
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, so to keep gathering attention
oon
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on
 real
art
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its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 important to spend some handsome
amoount
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amount
 on it.
For instance
Linking Words
, Madhubani is
special
Correct article usage
a special
show examples
 kind of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
art
Use synonyms
 of Bihar, it represents
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
show examples
 and
history
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 of Bihar. And to keep it alive for
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time or to promote the
art
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 and artist itss required
goveronment
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government
support
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. There are
however
Linking Words
, some people including me,
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
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 that
tax payers’
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taxpayers’
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 hard cash should
be invest
Change the verb form
be invested
be investing
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on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public services. As most
art
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 galleries are getting
huge
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a huge
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 amount of
money
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 from their ticket price
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itself
show examples
it self
Correct your spelling
itself
show examples
, it’s important to invest in
excelrate
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accelerate
excel rate
 medical
support
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 by
proliferation
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the proliferation
a proliferation
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 of staff and technologies.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
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 5000 tourist visit Delhi
art
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musium
Correct your spelling
museum
 daily by paying $20 ticket price, so the
musium
Correct your spelling
museum
it self
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itself
show examples
 earn $10000 daily and it looks like
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
suffcient
Correct your spelling
sufficient
 to run a
musium
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museum
. Clearly,
government
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the government
show examples
 needs to financially
support
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other public areas which actually required financial
support
Use synonyms
 in order to improve. In conclusion, as
art
Use synonyms
 galleries have other options to generate
money
Use synonyms
 its good to invest it in the area which are accessible by
large
Change the article
a large
the large
show examples
 number of people and which actually required financial
support
Use synonyms
.
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