Some people think that money is the most essential factor in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without such money, what other factors contribute to happiness.

#people #money #factor #happiness #factors

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Having everything except happiness makes an individual zero. It is often said that

wealth

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is the main element in enhancing personal joy. I completely support

this

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notion.

Nevertheless

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, it cannot be denied the influence of other factors which influence individual pleasure. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will put forth my views in detail. To commence with, as mentioned above

wealth

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have a key role in promoting personal contentment.

Firstly

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, money is essential to acquire the primary needs of an individual. Without which people might become unsatisfied and humiliated in society.

Secondly

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, financial security is necessary to overcome certain crises in life

such

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as illness or accidents. If individuals are stable enough to encounter those abrupt problems with their income, they could remain independent and with self-respect.

For example

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, according to the central human resource board in India, 70% of the citizens are living under depression due to abject poverty.

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, apart from

wealth

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, there are other elements that help with individual pleasure. To commence with, mental peace is a prominent factor. Even if the people are wealthy if they lack inner peace could have a deleterious effect on their life.

Furthermore

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, they struggle to mingle with others which might aggravate the scenario.

In addition

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, strong family relations have equal priority in influencing individual pleasure. Individuals would be disturbed they have to deal with shattered family relations.

For instance

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, a survey conducted by a reputed journal in the USA released a piece of shocking news that 65% of millionaires are under treatment for depression due to failed marital relations. To conclude, in my opinion,

wealth

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has a predominant position in increasing personal contentment.

However

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, there are other factors that support individual fulfilment like inner satisfaction and strong marital life.

Submitted by neethuchackochan on Wed Jun 30 2021

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Essential factor
Promote happiness
Sense of fulfillment
Social connections
Well-being
Physical health
Mental health
Goals and ambitions
Sense of purpose
Fulfillment
Engaging in activities
Hobbies
Gratitude
Contentment
Supportive community
Inclusive environment

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Some people think that money is the most essential factor in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without such money, what other factors contribute to happiness.

* In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that schools should choose students according to their academic abilities, while others think it is better to have students of different abilities studying together. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars and riding motorbikes. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)