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Band 7

It is generally acknowledged that families are now not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience.

#families #change
It is a common understanding that the connection between family members has grown weaker than ever.
This
 is due to the emergence of the wave of materialization and globalization, the product of industrialization and the digital age, that alter the intimacy between parents and children with the growing individualistic activities. These problems can be tackled by having the two parties dedicate proper occasion to share together. Both parents and youngsters tend to grow apart from each other due to the heightened social pressure and invasion of the wielding internet. While the increasing demands of life, owing to present days' infamous high competition, require parents to spend more
time
 at work to ensure the advancement in career and to sustain the household's financial stability, lesser and lesser
time
 are dedicated to their juvenile. On top of
that is
 exacerbated by the distraction introduced by the technology that persuades the child to stay online to play games, watch anime cartoons and chat with their friends
instead
 of spending some quality family
time
.
Consequently
, with the lack of parental supervision and care, children may easily fall victim to severe unfortunate events,
such
 as internet bully and the development of depression. These challenges are faced by a considerable number of families including mine, and these imminent incidents can be solved by finding common activities or interests within the family.
Instead
 of spending their
time
 separately, everybody can gather around a smart television and watch some enjoyable Netflix together after dinner. As in my family, we take turn selecting the movie or TV series to watch together at least twice a week at home. By doing so, I get the expand my movie lists and explore different genres.
Moreover
, as my mother is a foodie, she usually cooks or brings home a variety of exotic food for us so we could taste them and rate the dish together as a family. Even though the lack of bonding in a family is omnipresent nowadays as the evolution of technology provides several appealing substitutions to it, each family can creatively come up with activities that they get to enjoy each other's company.
Submitted by marisa.ishikawa24 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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