Some people think that developments involving the Internet have brought people closer together while others think that people and communities have become more isolated. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some
people
claim that
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
insulate for humanity for some reasons
such
as play computer games, sit at home and so on, while
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
think that
this
is the
ways
Fix the agreement mistake
way
show examples
to be closer and communicate between
people
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
social networks. I believe that
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
can bring more plusses than necessary. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will discuss both views and give my own opinion. On the one hand,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
a part of us and
thise
Correct your spelling
this
those
these
is awesome but not always
this
is good, cause of
this
is insulating and misunderstanding the
people
. What
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
mean by
this
is that
people
start to live in the game and think as well as
game
Correct article usage
the game
show examples
.
For example
, Franch science Leonard conducted research and claim that if someone will play 5 hours alone during the week they will be collapsed and it will be hard for them to find a way to speak. After
this
investigation
Add a comma
,investigation
show examples
more parents start to think about
this
research and forbid
to play
Change the verb form
playing
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
their children.
On the other hand
,
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
is easy to communicate and appoint dates.
In other words
, we can connect with each other in apps
such
as Telegram, Imo, Instagram and try to find
comfortable
Correct article usage
a comfortable
show examples
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
to meet.
For instance
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
use Telegram as
subject
Correct article usage
a subject
show examples
to speak and communicate with friends we always appoint
date
Fix the agreement mistake
dates
show examples
in
this
app and
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
meet with each other. It is one of the ways to use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
strongly believe that
people
stop
to play
Change the verb form
playing
show examples
games and start to think about life.
Submitted by nurlan32 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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