Some parents buy a lot of toys for their children. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children having a lot of toys?

Some
children
are given a
number
of
toys
by their
parents
.
This
is said to lead to those
youngsters
not only becoming independent of their
parents
fast but
also
avoiding being bullied, while
this
can cause
great
Add an article
a great
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financial burden on their
parents
and hamper the development of their imagination. Looking
first
at the advantages of providing
children
with a lot of
toys
,
this
accelerates their independence.
This
is because their faith in their
parents
grows fast, making them feel that whenever they are in trouble, their
parents
will help them.
As a result
, they try to do anything on their own. Another merit is that the more
toys
youngsters
own, the less likely they are to be bullied. I read in the newspaper that young people have the predisposition to be attracted to those having what they don’t
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and that giving
children
a
number
of
toys
can prevent them from becoming the target of bullying. Turning to the disadvantages, more
toys
can mean
heavier
Correct article usage
a heavier
show examples
financial burden on
parents
. The following incident was reported in Japan; a father run out of money, but his son pestered him to buy a video game he hoped for, which resulted in the father robbing an old lady of her purse and being arrested for the crime.
Besides
, giving a lot of
toys
prevents
children
from being imaginative. If they have few
toys
, they will try to do anything to enjoy themselves with the limited
number
of
toys
.
However
, surrounded by a
number
of
toys
,
youngsters
will be deprived of the chance. To conclude, being purchased a lot of
toys
enables
youngsters
to cultivate their self-dependence and to avoid being bullied, but at the same time, it can be a great cause of monetary burden on
parents
and the dearth of
children
’s imagination.
Submitted by momonanaharunatus on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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