IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

'Nowadays, news companies spend a lot of money covering international news. However, local news is more relevant to people's lives and should receive more funding.' To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#news #companies #money #people #lives
Nowadays we live in a globalised world which seems to be getting smaller every day. As a consequence, it is not surprising that international
news
 attracts most
people
’s attention, and that
news
organisations
 spend a large part of their budget on
this
.
News
stories
 about things happening on the other side of the world are often dramatic and on a large scale, seeming much more exciting than local
news
.
However
, in my opinion,
news
organisations
 should
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
also
 provide enough money to be able to cover local issues thoroughly.
Firstly
, apart from occasional holidays, most
people
 spend the majority of their lives living and working in their local community. If there
some
Add a missing verb
is some
show examples
 important change or event, it is more likely to have a direct impact on their day-to-day life.
Therefore
, it is important for
news
organisations
 to be able to provide up-to-the-minute information to local citizens.
For example
, if there is a large fire in their city,
people
 need to know as soon as possible in order to take precautions.
Furthermore
, international
news
stories
 are often depressing,
full
Correct word choice
and full
show examples
 of violence and misery. If
people
 only focus on these large-scale events far away they will feel that the world is a terrible place.
On the other hand
, if
news
organisations
 can provide lots of examples of goodness in their local area,
such
 as
people
 helping each other in various ways, that will surely lift
people
’s spirits.
That is
 not to say that
news
organisations
 should be forced to cover local
news
. In most countries, the gathering and broadcasting of
news
stories
 exist within a competitive marketplace, and these
organisations
 need to attract advertisers and make a profit.
Nevertheless
, in my
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
 it would most certainly improve the quality of
people
’s lives if there was more coverage of local
news
stories
.
Submitted by mail2sooraj on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • immediacy
  • relevance
  • community cohesion
  • investigative journalism
  • accountability
  • mismanagement
  • economic argument
  • globalization
  • cross-cultural understanding
  • well-rounded global perspective
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