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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that children should start school sooner while others believe ‎they should not start it before seven. Discuss both views, and give your own ‎opinion.‎

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In recent years, the schooling
age
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 has become a pressing concern. Some individuals assert that youngsters should begin school at an early
age
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,
while
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 others favour that they should start after turning seven.
This
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 essay intends to analyse both perspectives
along with
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 my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, the advocates of sending kids at an early
age
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 opine that children have sharper memory and are more active during their early years in their lives. As they can remember and learn
the
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apply
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things more quickly without making much effort.
For instance
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, in Western countries,
parents
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 send their children to preschool at the
age
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 of 2 or 3, during which they come to know about the culture of school and
also
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 study the basic skills required for starting school after turning 5. Another benefit is that their sporting ability can
also
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 be identified at their early stages, which is essential for their
overall
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 growth and making more success in that particular field.
On the other hand
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, some believe that the
parents
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 should start the schooling of their kids after reaching seven.
Firstly
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, they are capable of taking
their
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apply
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care without any assistance from others, which leads to improved quality of life.
For instance
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, in India, where many youngsters are starting their studies at the
age
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 of 7, they have a deeper connection with their cultural values and roots, which are imperative for getting in touch with the culture. Another significant benefit is that
the
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they
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 closer to their families, as when juveniles
use
Verb problem
spend
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 a lot of time with their
parents
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 and grandparents, they tend to have more sentimental value for them. In conclusion,
according to
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 my opinion,
the
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apply
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parents
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 should start the schooling of their kids at the
age
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 of 6 or 7, as it positively affects their nurturing and upbringing within their families, and more connection with cultural roots is
also
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 vital for keeping the culture alive and moral values.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure to introduce clear topic sentences for each paragraph to improve clarity and logical flow.
Task Achievement
Consider providing more detailed examples to strengthen your arguments and enhance the depth of your analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your conclusions clearly reiterate your main points and message to leave a lasting impression.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument well before presenting your opinion.
Task Achievement
The use of examples, such as preschools in Western countries and education in India, effectively supports the arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Early education
  • Foundational skills
  • Cognitive abilities
  • Discipline and routine
  • Emotional intelligence
  • Developmental pace
  • Unstructured play
  • Competitive advantage
  • Academic exposure
  • Educational systems
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