At the present time the population of some country include large number of young adult compared with no of older people do ou think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

#time #population #country #adult #people #ou #outweigh

Nowadays, in a few nations, the percentage of

youth

is exceeding that of elderly people.The following paragraphs will outline the benefits and drawbacks of

such

a scenario and give my opinion after

comapring

Correct your spelling

comparing

them.

To begin

with, there are basically two main advantages if there is more young population in a nation.

Firstly

, when all these

youth

get graduated, some of them will definitely turn into entrepreneurs and

as a

result

Add a comma

,result

show examples

increasing the economic growth of that nation.

Secondly

, these youngsters are always ready to give their service in case of any unfortunate incident like a natural calamity.

Thus

lending a hand to their native state in

emergency

Add an article

an emergency

show examples

For instance

, when a state is

overlfed

Correct your spelling

overfed

covered

with rains, we can see a lot of

youth

coming out and helping the women and children to rescue homes.

This

way ,they are always available for help.

On the other hand

, one of the main

disadvanges

Correct your spelling

disadvantages

of having

a huge younger individuals

Correct the article-noun agreement

a huge younger individual

huge younger individuals

show examples

is providing employment for all of them .That means, generally , the number of vacancies in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

any sector

are

Change the verb form

show examples

fixed and

hence

accommodating

such

a huge number in offices is impossible.

This

leads to

unemployment

Correct article usage

an unemployment

show examples

outburst

Fix the agreement mistake

outbursts

show examples

in the constitution.

Besides

this

, unemployed

youth

can put their legs into illegal activities and spoil their future.

For instance

, some can even supply banned goods and get jailed. In conclusion, in some of the nations increased

number

Change the article

a number

the number

show examples

of young adults is being witnessed.

This

scenario has both advantages and disadvantages.

However

, disadvantages are more alarming as unemployment can ruin many fresh lives.

Hence

, I

beleive

Correct your spelling

believe

that advantages could not gain the control over

disadvantges

Correct your spelling

disadvantages

Submitted by Sri on Wed Jul 07 2021

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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At the present time the population of some country include large number of young adult compared with no of older people do ou think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

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