Some people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Others think that people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #individuals #work

Recently, it is the opinion of some that old

people

should be no longer included in the workforce and retire. While there may be potential downsides of

this

view, others argue that the elderly should be allowed to

work

as long as they prefer, myself included.

To begin

with, it is easy to argue that hiring older employees might cause negative effects on younger

people

This

is because if

companies

keep hiring older

people

, it will be difficult for youths to compete with them.

Consequently

, young

people

may feel resentment and depression.

Secondly

, some

people

believe elderly

people

are not fully qualified for modern-day jobs in comparison with younger

people

This

is owing to the fact that most

companies

rely on cutting-edge technologies in their

work

. With that in mind, schools and universities teach and train their students on the basics of these technologies;

therefore

, they are more prepared to join the workforce. Having said that, it would be a mistake to think that everyone thinks that way.

Firstly

, older

people

can contribute in

improve

Change the form of the verb

improving

show examples

the economy significantly.

This

is based on the fact they already have valuable experience and knowledge which most likely can help make planning for accomplishments.

For instance

, in the USA, many ex-employees who worked for mega-corporations

such

as Microsoft were hired as managers in small and mid-sized

companies

;

as a result

, these

companies

made remarkable success in a shorter time.

Moreover

, these new

companies

make a contribution to the local economy by the taxes they pay. What is more, allowing old

people

work

after their retirement age is considered a good gesture from society. The reason for

this

is that when society allows older ones to

work

, they will feel a sense of appreciation and gratitude. In conclusion, while hiring older

people

has several downsides

such

as it would be harder for young

people

to find jobs and being not able to cope with new technologies, I agree with those who are encouraging older

people

work

this

will a positive effect on the local economy as well as showing

acknowledgment

Change the spelling

acknowledgement

show examples

and recognition toward their lifetime

work

Submitted by omarmohamed995 on Thu Jul 08 2021

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

354 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Others think that people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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