In many places, people’s lifestyles are changing rapidly, and this affects family relationships. Do you think the advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages
Nowadays, everything is quicker than ever and
this
acceleration also
reflecting
in lifestyles. Today's Wrong verb form
reflected
all
opportunities and advancements in every field, people tend to change their Correct determiner usage
apply
job
and Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
location
easily. Fix the agreement mistake
locations
Although
it may affect family relations, it makes sense of keeping
pace with life and embrace new opportunities. Change preposition
to keep
This
way, our time will be more valuable and not wasted. This
is why I found this
situation beneficial in every respect.
First of all, it is a fact that when you structure your permanent lifestyle with a family, it is harder to abandon where you live or your job because every decision you make also
interests others to whom you are attached and restrict
your freedom. Indeed, if you want to change your Correct subject-verb agreement
restricts
even
department Rephrase
apply
in
Change preposition
apply
the
work, you will have second thoughts because vest amount of elements may depend on you Correct article usage
apply
such
as location or salary in the family. For instance
, some occupations in Turkey request to moving
city to city regularly Wrong verb form
move from
such
as soldiers and judges which is making
it so hard for a soldier's family to be acquainted with neighbours and Wrong verb form
makes
having
a permanent layout.
Wrong verb form
have
On the other hand
, advancements in technology and communication allow us to socialise with people on the other side of the world and even we are influenced by them or other lifestyles in social media. Therefore
, classic job defining or steps in lifepaths are mostly abandoned and substituted with quick and sudden changes. For instance
,so many people are influencers as a career on social media with university diplomas from medicine or law which couldn't be imagined in the past.
To conclude
, sudden changes in life may seem disadvantage
Replace the word
disadvantageous
due to
affecting folks around us. However
, developments in every field make it possible to getting
closer to our dreams as freer and act Change the form of the verb
get
according to
our wishes compared with decades ago.Submitted by bilgekapusuzoglu on
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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is weak and lacks clarity. The introduction and conclusion are present, but require more development to effectively bookend the essay. The main points lack strong supporting evidence and coherence is lacking in several areas. Develop a clear, well-structured argument with stronger supporting examples.
task achievement
The response addresses the prompt but the ideas lack clarity and coherence. There is an attempt to present relevant examples but they are not well-connected to the main points. Focus on providing a clear and comprehensive argument that effectively addresses the prompt.