Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Teenage is the phase of

life

Use synonyms

which must be spent properly and wisely. It is an important phase, which if wasted can ruin the entire

life

Use synonyms

. While some people are of the opinion that

teenagers

Use synonyms

should be made to work and earn

money

Use synonyms

, others believe that they should be allowed to enjoy and engage in the activities of their choice.According to

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

teenage

Correct article usage

the teenage

show examples

years should be spent relaxing and investing in hobbies.The following paragraphs will discuss both opinions in detail and justify my opinion. Today, more and more parents are encouraging their teenage children to take up a part-

time

Use synonyms

job during the holidays.

This

Linking Words

infact

Correct your spelling

in fact

extremely beneficial for the children and their all-round development. When

teenagers

Use synonyms

work, they realize the amount of effort and

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

it takes to earn

money

Use synonyms

and

thus

Linking Words

learn to use it properly and not waste it on unnecessary things.

For example

Linking Words

, there was a friend of mine who loved online shopping and would spend loads of

money

Use synonyms

on buying useless stuff.

However

Linking Words

, when she began her part-

time

Use synonyms

job at McDonald's , she realized how hard her parents worked to bring home the

money

Use synonyms

and since

then

Linking Words

she stopped purchasing things

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

were not needed. Summer jobs

also

Linking Words

help

teenagers

Use synonyms

to become disciplined and stay active all the

time

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

teaches them valuable and practical skills , essential for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

future

life

Use synonyms

Thus

Linking Words

working during the vacation is definitely beneficial for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

teenagers

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it is

also

Linking Words

true that they should be allowed to have fun with their friends and pursue their hobbies, which they are not able to do during

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

school

time

Use synonyms

because of lack of

time

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is essential for their growth and mental health.

For instance

Linking Words

, during my school holidays,

Change the capitalization

show examples

would always go for a long trek in the Himalayas. It helped me to rejuvenate and start the

Linking Words

chapter of my

life

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with zeal and enthusiasm.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, if people don't enjoy and live their

life

Use synonyms

to the fullest in their teen years,

then

Linking Words

they would never be able to do it in the future. Because as

teenagers

Use synonyms

turn into adults, they will rarely have

time

Use synonyms

to pursue their hobbies and be carefree. To conclude, even though forcing

teenagers

Use synonyms

to do

a part-

Correct the article-noun agreement

part-time jobs

a part-time job

show examples

time

Use synonyms

jobs during the vacation is advantageous for them and their future

life

Use synonyms

, I think that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they should not be over-worked and must be allowed to have fun and make memories with their friends.

Submitted by yashashrikolalle on Wed Jul 14 2021

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

411 words

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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Word Count

Last weekend, your cousin celebrated her 50th birthday, but you could not attend and forgot to cancel. Write a letter to your cousin. In your letter: Apologize for missing the birthday celebration Explain why you missed it and why you had not let her know Describe how you will make it up to her

Many educational institues are offering online courses. Do the advantages of this form of education outweigh the disadvantages.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In some areas of the US, a ‘curfew’ is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night uncles they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?