IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

It is better to grow a child in city than in rural areas, Do you agree or disagree?

#child #city #areas
Living conditions are very important for the overall
growth
 of the
child
.While some people prefer to raise their pupils in suburban areas.
However
,I believe that growing a
child
 in larger cities have major benefits,
such
 as access to better education and
sports
 facilities.
Firstly
, The urban areas provide the best in class education infrastructure compared with
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
.It not only allows them access to all the modern educational tools
such
 as modern teaching methods but
also
 guidance by expert teachers.
In addition
, they have an option to choose from different private coaching institutions and modern libraries.
For instance
, a student studying in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 metro city like Mumbai
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 can attend
world-known
Correct article usage
a world-known
show examples
 school and can utilise the resources of the same for overall
growth
.
Secondly
, The cities will have better facilities for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
 activities. If a
child
 is interested to pursue
sports
 as a career,
then
 parents can easily find and enrol them in
such
sports
Correct article usage
a sports
show examples
academy
Fix the agreement mistake
academies
show examples
. If they are deprived of these facilities in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country side
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
then
 the
child
 has to curb their dreams and it might force a
child
 to pursue
dream
Add an article
a dream
show examples
 which he is not passionate about. In turn, which will affect their overall
growth
 and performance in academics. It is quite important that parents should be able to provide the best environment for playing a special sport like tennis or football. In conclusion, I believe it is wise to grow the
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 in the urban cities because of the better education environment and overall access to
sports
faciltilies
Correct your spelling
facilities
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
counrty
Correct your spelling
country
side
Add a comma
,side
show examples
such
growth
Correct article usage
a growth
show examples
 atmosphere can not be guaranteed.
Submitted by Tushar wable on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: