Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community?

#job #seekers #receipt #government #work #community

The

people

who receive more advantage from the country for a long

time

have to give back to the society. I totally agree with

this

concept and I will elaborate my reasons in the following paragraphs. First and foremost, the country has spent a lot of money to pay for workers. Most of the money is retrieved from citizens in the

nation

by tax.

Therefore

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job seekers should realize their income. It makes sense that they have to do something in order to show gratitude to the community.

For example

, when they have free

time

, they are supposed to take

this

opportunity to work as a volunteer. Especially helping the

people

who live in remote areas.

Secondly

, The

people

who have worked in the government for a long

time

, have more knowledge and experience.

This

can bring plenty of advantages back to the

county

Correct your spelling

country

show examples

Moreover

, they have good relationships and connections with several sections

Change preposition

show examples

the government. So, they can use

this

to support the

nation

For instance

, Some

people

have been working as doctors for a long

time

after

Correct word choice

and after

show examples

they retire from

thiers

Correct your spelling

their

position, they are willing to use the knowledge to help

people

in small villages around the countryside.

This

is very useful for the overview of the

nation

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because they are not only encouraging the population

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but fostering the whole of the country. In conclusion, I fully agree that the

people

who work and receive advantage from the

nation

for

Correct your spelling

a long

show examples

along

Correct your spelling

a long

show examples

time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

should give back something to help the whole of the

nation

Submitted by mahawichet on Wed Nov 29 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that the essay has a clear and logical structure that is easy for the reader to follow. The essay should begin with an introduction that clearly states your position, followed by body paragraphs that each focus on a single main idea with relevant supporting details, concluding with a summarizing paragraph that restates your stance and reviews key points.

Task Achievement

Your essay should fully address all parts of the task. It should present a clear and focused position throughout your response and include a conclusion that succinctly summarizes your main points. Make sure to provide specific examples to support your arguments.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Some employers believe that job applicants’ social skills are more important than their academic qualifications. To what extent do you agree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What problems is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this situation?

Some feel that governments should prioritize healthcare instead of other important areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as redidential areas for the growing population or to develop business and boost economies To what extend do you agree or disagree with this?

An increasing number of professionals such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?