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Writing Samples
Band 7

Opinion In the modern world, it is no longer necessary to use animals for food, or animal products for clothing and medicine, for example. Do you agree or disagree with this statement.

#world #animals #food #products #medicine
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Nowadays a majority of the community believes that consuming
animals
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' meat and other animal
products
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 should be stopped.
However
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, I reckon in some cases like using
animals
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 for food should be limited
also
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 in some other cases some alternatives must replace animal
products
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.
In particular
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, these days sometimes
people
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 misuse
animals
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' meat and dairy which is caused some diseases like heart attack and being overweight.
Accordingly
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, the demands for meat and
such
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 like
products
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 have increased.
As a result
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, the number of livestock should increase which requires enormous agricultural lands to fulfil
this
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 need,
this
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 attempt can have bad consequences like farmland degradation.
Thus
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,
people
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 should add some substitutes like soy or beans which have the same nutritious benefits. Apart from that, using animal
products
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 should be completely eliminated the extraordinary developments in science.
People
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 can replace fur clothes with cotton and high-quality viscose fabrics.
Moreover
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, some myths had been spread in the past that some specific
animals
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' horn has medical uses there individuals hunt
animals
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 cruelly for only
this
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 purpose.
Therefore
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, the government should impose some laws against these
people
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 and avoid
this
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 horrible tradition.
In addition
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 to
this
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, some other fashion companies have spread some trendy dresses that are designed from fox's fur,
hence
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, some institutions trap foxes in cages and raise them for only their skin which is terrible and must be prevented. To conclude, even though humans can use
animals
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 for food decently
on the other hand
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 they should consider some substitutes in other areas that are using animal
products
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 like the clothing industry or medical areas.
Submitted by jared-100 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ethical consumption
  • sustainability
  • veganism
  • synthetic alternatives
  • bioengineering
  • animal welfare
  • culturally ingrained
  • biodiversity
  • a shift in paradigm
  • intensive farming
  • environmental footprint
  • plant-based
  • animal testing
  • cruelty-free
  • conservation efforts
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