IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Write about the following topic: Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #countries #money #poverty #aid
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Developed
nations
Use synonyms
 are the
nations
Use synonyms
 where the disparity between the rich and the poor is at the lowest and the
people
Use synonyms
 of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
nations
Use synonyms
 enjoy a better standard of
livng
Correct your spelling
living
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
 the rest of the
nations
Use synonyms
 in the world. Whereas, the nation in which the disparity between the rich and the poor is very high and
people
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 have to suffer even for their basic rights is known as a developing nation. Currently,
India
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 is at the developing stage. It is true that the developed
nations
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 help the developing
nations
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 by
providng
Correct your spelling
providing
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
show examples
 for their development projects and it is the duty of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 developed
nations
Use synonyms
 to help
Linking Words
this poor
Change the determiner
this poor nation
these poor nations
show examples
nations
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, but sometimes money is not the solution. It is a
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
 fact that money cannot solve all our problems and I agree with it. The developed
nations
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 should look beyond the financial aid and think about helping the
people
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 of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 poor
countries
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. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement that the rich
countries
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 should help the poor
countries
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, not only financially but by using other means as well. The rich
countries
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 have the technology to develop their infrastructure in unbelievably quick time and the same should be shared with the poor
countries
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 so that they can develop their poor
infrstructure
Correct your spelling
infrastructure
. By
infrastucuture
Correct your spelling
infrastructure
, I mean the development of transportation services, sanitary services,
seawage
Correct your spelling
sewage
 systems, corporate parks, etc. One of the best
example
Change to a plural noun
examples
show examples
 of
rich
Add an article
the rich
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 country helping
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 poor country was seen in the
70's
Fix apostrophe usage
'70s
show examples
: The state of Gujarat located in
India
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 had faced a huge earthquake and the calamity had destroyed many villages and cities of Gujarat, killing thousands of
people
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. Japan came to the aid of
India
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 and helped them develop their infrastructure. Japan
also
Linking Words
 provided technology that helped to detect
Add an article
an earthquake
show examples
earthquake
Fix the agreement mistake
earthquakes
show examples
 in advance and
also
Linking Words
 helped in building
earthquake proof
Add a hyphen
earthquake-proof
show examples
 buildings to avoid
such
Linking Words
 huge
calamity
Fix the agreement mistake
calamities
show examples
 in future.
This
Linking Words
 single gesture of Japan helped
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
India
Use synonyms
 to rebuild the state of Gujarat and
also
Linking Words
 saved the lives of thousands of
people
Use synonyms
 in the coming future.
Submitted by naman.gadhia on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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