In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What are the main causes and what measures could be taken to solve these problems?

In several nations, the average mass of humans is raising and
healhtiness
Correct your spelling
healthiness
and wellness are
diminshing
Correct your spelling
diminishing
. In my opinion, there
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
two main reasons
such
as lifestyle and
fastfood
Correct your spelling
fast food
fast-food
eating habits.
This
essay will consider the main causes of
Add an article
the
show examples
rise
Change the verb form
rising
show examples
in obesity, before proposing two possible solutions.
First
and foremost, the most important cause of increasing
weight
of
people
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
a fast-paced world.Because the advent of the internet and technology has
changing
Change the verb form
to change
show examples
our life so much.
Therefore
people
need to
active
Add a missing verb
be active
show examples
every possible hour to not left behind
information
Add an article
the information
show examples
.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
people
go on
fastfood
Correct your spelling
fast food
which has rich fat
cybohydrate
Correct your spelling
carbohydrate
carbohydrates
, rather than cooking food.
Secondly
, jobs are becoming desk-bound and limited
physicall
Correct your spelling
physical
activity.
However
, there are two promising solutions to
this
problem.
First
of all,
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
healt
Correct your spelling
health
care should
pay
Add the particle
topay
show examples
give small attention to prevent gaining
weight
.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
give voucher or appeal
who
Change preposition
to who
show examples
attends
fittness
Correct your spelling
fitness
or yoga class.
This
would more
attracte
Correct your spelling
attractive
attracted
people
in
exersice
Correct your spelling
exercise
and
eventually
Add a comma
,eventually
show examples
average
people
weight
will decrease.
Secondly
,
people
need to know
Correct your spelling
today
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
healthy dishes are actually fast as
fastfoods
Correct your spelling
fast foods
.If
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
consume
well balanced
Add a hyphen
well-balanced
show examples
nutrions
Correct your spelling
nutrition
nutrients
they will lose
weight
and stay fit even they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
exersice
Correct your spelling
exercise
often. In conclusion,21
centry
Correct your spelling
century
Weight
is
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
problem in many
state
Change to a plural noun
states
show examples
because of
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
world.
Although
Correct article usage
the
show examples
govermant
Correct your spelling
government
governments
and
people
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
to pay attention to
weight
and lifestyle
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary
  • obesity
  • overweight
  • physical activity
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • exercise
  • unhealthy diet
  • fast food
  • urbanization
  • modernization
  • stress
  • awareness
  • education
  • government intervention
  • policies
  • promotion
  • sports
  • fitness programs
  • health education
  • taxation
  • public transportation
  • infrastructure
  • parks
  • recreational spaces
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