Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view
Nowadays, Sports are becoming more and more popular
activities
all over the world. While extreme sports like sky diving and skiing are dangerous,
so that the government should take necessary actions in order to ban it. Remove the comma
apply
This
is due to the fact that many people
who involved
in serious injuries and Add a missing verb
were involved
also
ended up in deaths. In my opinion, these activities
should be completely restrict
to avoid Change the verb form
be completely restricted
the
loss.
Correct article usage
apply
Firstly
, one of the main reasons is severe injuries while participating in the events. However
, people
get excited and thrilled while engaging but due to the lack of precautions and necessary training as it may cause damages to the body. For example
, while doing skiing most of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
do not wear a protective
Correct the article-noun agreement
protective equipment
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
such
as helmet
, knee braces, arm braces if they Fix the agreement mistake
helmets
fell
they will get severe injuries which even break Correct your spelling
feel
a legs
, hands. From my own experience, my brother participated in Correct the article-noun agreement
a leg
legs
such
activity with no full coverage which effected
him to Correct your spelling
affected
Replace the word
lose
loose
his leg.
Correct your spelling
lose
Consequently
, by
performing high risky attempts with fear can lead to death. Change preposition
apply
This
is because of fear generated while jumping from heights as it lead
to raise the blood pressure levels and create a panic in Change the verb form
leads
heart
which causes heart attacks. Add an article
the heart
For instance
, the average BP for a normal person is 120/80 but if it crosses 140/100 can create a heavy blood flow with this
situation heart rate will increase to
normal to high and stop functioning.
To sum up, Change preposition
from
although
people
get excited by doing extreme activities
as it creates fun for them but it is more risky
. The authorities should strictly impose a ban on harmful Replace the words
riskier
activities
in order to save the lives of the people
. To me risk involved sports are not at all encouraged.Submitted by marubolu on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!