The education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The youth are considered as the most important group to be educated in most states, whereas some argue that educating illiterate grown-ups is more crucial than youngsters and more money should be funded on
this
. I am in favour of adults being trained due to the fact that their chance to find a
job
would grow and crime
rates
caused by unemployment and poverty would reduce.
To begin
with, unemployment is one of the most worrying issues among illiterate older citizens nowadays and supporting them to learn about an occupation by vocational training would help them
finding
Change the form of the verb
find
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a
job
.
This
is because most adults who are not able to write or read are less confident and more unwilling for applying for jobs
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
are already limited. If they are trained
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
certain occupations, they will be provided with new skills and find jobs. As a natural result, the number of adults without a
job
would reduce and these people could send their children to school easily owing to their financial stability.
For example
, Canada is one of the pertinent examples, which has escalated its financial support on illiterate older generations and saw a considerable plunge in the
rates
of unemployment among them.
Furthermore
, providing older generations who don’t have reading and writing experience with courses could plummet crime
rates
as well. It is a well-known fact that being jobless and impoverished stand out as the most likely
causes
Fix the agreement mistake
cause
show examples
of offences. If those people were provided with the necessary knowledge for a certain occupation, they would be less involved in illegal activities.
For instance
, statistics from the Turkey government revealed that crime incidents have dropped by 30 % since 2014
,
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apply
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when occupational training
campaign
Fix the agreement mistake
campaigns
show examples
for illiterate citizens started. In conclusion, despite the young are being more essential in terms of education in some countries, others including me assert that due to more
job
opportunities and fewer offence
rates
, people who can not read or write should be prioritized and more money should be spent on them.
Submitted by arya_668 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

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  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy programs
  • functional illiteracy
  • social mobility
  • inter-generational poverty
  • workforce development
  • economic growth
  • social cohesion
  • public health
  • civic participation
  • resource allocation
  • national development
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