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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

About physical exercise, some people prefer to exercise in a fitness center, while others prefer outdoor activities, choose one of them and argue about it.

#exercise #people #fitness #center #activities
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In the hustle and bustle of modern life, we often find ourselves confined to the indoors, surrounded by concrete and the artificial hum of technology.
While
Linking Words
 gyms and fitness
centers
Change the spelling
centres
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 offer convenience and a controlled environment, there is an undeniable appeal to taking our workouts outdoors. Exercising in
nature
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 not only provides a multitude of physical benefits but
also
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 enhances our mental and emotional well-being. The beauty of
nature
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 serves as a powerful motivator, transforming exercises into refreshing experiences. The fresh air, the warm sunlight, and the gentle breeze awaken our senses, making us feel more alive and engaged in our physical activity. The ever-changing scenery of the outdoors provides a welcome distraction, keeping us mentally stimulated and preventing boredom from setting in. Engaging in physical activity in the middle of
nature
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 has been shown to have a positive impact on our mental health. Studies have demonstrated that spending time outdoors can reduce stress, anxiety, and symptoms of depression. The calming effect of
nature
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, combined with the release of endorphins during exercise, creates a sense of
tranquility
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tranquillity
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 and emotional well-being.
Moreover
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, exercising outdoors has been associated with improved cognitive function.
The exposure
Correct article usage
Exposure
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 to natural stimuli,
such
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 as the sounds of birds or the movement of leaves, can enhance our focus, memory, and creativity. The natural environment provides a rich sensory experience that stimulates the brain in ways that indoor environments cannot replicate. In conclusion, embracing the outdoors for our exercise routines offers a multitude of benefits that extend beyond physical fitness. The beauty and
tranquility
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tranquillity
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 of
nature
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 provide a motivating environment that enhances our mental and emotional well-being. The varied terrain and unpredictable conditions found in
nature
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 challenge our bodies in new ways, improving our coordination, agility, and
overall
Linking Words
 fitness. As we strive for a healthier lifestyle, let us not forget the transformative power of exercising in the embrace of
nature
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by bsb.roberta on

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task achievement
Ensure that the argument is balanced with specific examples to support claims. While the essay clearly favors outdoor activities, including comparisons or studies related to fitness centers could strengthen the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Incorporate a wider variety of connectives and discourse markers to improve the logical flow of ideas. Use them to clearly outline the arguments, as well as to connect supporting details to main points.
message
While the lexical range was strong, incorporating more precise and varied vocabulary specific to the topic of physical exercise can enhance the essay's overall impact.
message
Make an effort to use a variety of complex sentence structures to demonstrate grammatical range. This can include the use of conditional sentences, relative clauses, and different types of conjunctions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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