Some people think that the best way to reduce the time spent in travelling to work is to replace parks and gardens close to the city center with apartment buildings for commuters, but others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #time #work #parks #gardens #city #center #apartment #buildings #commuters

With the increasing of commuting

time

in recent years, there are residents suggesting to occupy public entertaining

areas

including

parks

and gardens with residential buildings, while others and I disagree with

this

statement. In

this

essay, I will discuss both opinions and my idea with examples. On the one hand, it is true that the commuters spend an extremely long

time

on the way to work every day, so shortening the travelling

time

is necessary. In that case, the idea of occupying public

areas

is understandable.

This

is because most of the botanical gardens and People’s

parks

are usually located in central suburbs as well as most of the commercial offices in high-rise buildings.

For example

, in Melbourne, the Botanical Garden covers an area of ten thousand square meters right

to the Commercial Business District. People of Melbourne may spend less than ten minutes to their offices if they moved to the Botanical Garden.

On the other hand

, even though it seems effective to replace public

areas

with residential buildings, I do not agree with the suggestion because of the two reasons below.

First

and foremost, public

areas

are symbols of high quality of life because people’s lives are not only full of work and careers.

Instead

, the importance of life-work balance has been valued more in the

last

decades. If the governments destroy the

parks

and gardens, residents will have no place to take a walk and exercise in their spare

time

, which will definitely lower the quality of living.

Furthermore

, greens in

parks

are the lungs of the city. As reports have shown that air pollution has seriously influenced the health of human beings in urban

areas

since twenty century, including lung cancer and strep throat.

Therefore

, with a reasonable amount of plants, the problem of carbon dioxide and other air polluted contaminants can be alleviated in urban

areas

. In conclusion, even though lessening the commuting pressure is necessary, in my opinion, it is not the best idea to construct apartments on our limited green land in central suburbs.

Submitted by fanganqi79 on Mon Jul 26 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

342 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

commuters
urban areas
housing availability
alleviating housing crises
public transport
traffic congestion
environmental health
biodiversity
recreational
mental health benefits
urban heat islands
green lungs
community interaction
cohesion
innovative urban planning
multi-use buildings

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Some people think that the best way to reduce the time spent in travelling to work is to replace parks and gardens close to the city center with apartment buildings for commuters, but others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

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