People nowadays are not fit and active than the people from the olden days. Discuss the causes for this situation and suggest some possible Solutions

Ever since the genesis of industrialisation, human beings have gone through many different changes.

This

is evident from the fact that

people

are no longer as physically fit and active as they used to be. It is argued that increased use of technology and removal of many physically demanding jobs are the two cardinal reasons for

this

. To tackle these problems, educational programs and the establishment of

health

facilities will be analysed for viability.

To begin

, many individuals have adopted television and internet browsing as their hobbies, which has led to them adopting sedentary lifestyles. To counter

this

, educational programs aimed at these

people

can educate them about the hazards

such

a lifestyle poses to the

health

of an individual.

For instance

, the government of Pakistan has run many infomercials in the past few years to increase awareness about the importance of exercising among the geriatric population. Which in turn, resulted in a lower number of elderly

people

reporting joint-related problems in the coming years.

Therefore

, the effectiveness of

such

targeted campaigns can be clearly seen.

In addition

, due to industrialisation, the nature of jobs around the world has moved from being physically demanding to service-oriented.

Consequently

, a large chunk of

people

does not get the necessary physical activity required to have a sound body. For

this

, establishment of more

health

facilities around the residential areas is a plausible solution.

For example

, a psychological study

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

recently conducted, found that

people

are generally less likely to exercise if they have to travel a long distance to get to the exercise location. As

this

shows, the establishment of

such

facilities near

people

’s residences is an effective method to address lifestyle-related problems. As is clear, targeted educational campaigns and setting up more

health

clubs are two effective ways to make

people

form healthy habits and become healthy individuals. It is

thus

hoped that these strategies are put into practice by the masses the world over.

Submitted by lamnguyenphuc03 on Tue Jul 27 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

322 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People nowadays are not fit and active than the people from the olden days. Discuss the causes for this situation and suggest some possible Solutions

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that there should be a single official international language. Others oppose to this idea. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities while others think that it depends on other factors. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today's world of advanced science and techonology, we still greatly vaulue our artists such as muscians, painters and writers. What can art tell us about life that science and technology cannot?

Living alone is better than living in with someone. .Do you agree or disagree?

Topic: In many countries, more and more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?