Some people say that students who achieve the highest scores in their exams should be rewarded. Others say that those who show progress should be rewarded instead. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people believe that top-performing students should be praised.
However
, others argue that those, who constantly try to improve their academic performance, deserve recognition.
This
essay will discuss both views,
although
I firmly believe that both categories of pupils should be recognised for their accomplishments. On the one hand, it is undeniable that individuals put a great deal of hard work and effort to maintain excellent marks. On top of that, the vast majority of straight-A students have to sacrifice other aspects of their lives, which are equally important for social development.
For instance
, they devote their weekends to preparing for the
next
class,
instead
of taking well deserved rest and spending time with friends.
Such
behaviour might lead to tremendous consequences, which include burn-out, anxiety and depression.
Thus
, in order to keep their minds on positive aspects of studying and to motivate them
further
, it is crucial to recognise their hard work by rewarding them.
On the other hand
, it takes colossal effort to identify own mistakes and start working on them.
Such
pupils
also
sacrifice their hobbies and social life in order to improve their marks. And while they might not be a top-performer student, their progress is noticeable.
Nevertheless
, it is still difficult for them to keep their focus on perfecting test scores and continuously persuade higher results.
Hence
, students, whose academic achievements are improved over the course of time, should be awarded as well. To conclude, whether it is a top of the class student or someone, who is trying to increase their overall academic results, the efforts and work put into the final achievement should be rewarded.
Submitted by yerassem on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: