IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Now-a-days many people choose to be self-employed, rather than work for a company. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

#now-a-days #people #work #company #be #case
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many individuals nowadays prefer to
work
Use synonyms
 for themselves rather than being employed in an organization. The main reason behind
this
Linking Words
 preference is the freedom which
people
Use synonyms
 get by working independently.
However
Linking Words
, I believe
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon has both merits and demerits and one has to
very
Add a missing verb
be very
show examples
 careful before taking
such
Linking Words
 a decision.
To begin
Linking Words
 with self-employment merits, entrepreneurship is greatly encouraged with lots of business seminars and workshops advertised. Generally, any information on setting up a company is easily accessible for those who are willing, as being a business person, the image itself has a feeling of luxury, respectability, and success. An entrepreneur gets
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
multiple sources of income
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if he chooses to invest in different projects and can easily become wealthier
as
Change preposition
than
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Steve Jobs. Another benefit of being self-employed, you can be your own boss and can
work
Use synonyms
 remotely with
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
flexible hours.
However
Linking Words
, there are several drawbacks to
this
Linking Words
. To start with, there is no guarantee that a self-employed person will earn enough to live a comfortable life. When
people
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 for a company, they have the assurance of a guaranteed paycheck at the end of the month;
however
Linking Words
, when they
work
Use synonyms
 for themselves
this
Linking Words
 guarantee is missing. Another disadvantage is that many self-employed
people
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 day and night and do not get time to spend with their family and friends.
Thus
Linking Words
, it creates an imbalance in their
work
Use synonyms
 and personal life.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a huge difference can be seen in their daily routine which affects their health adversely. To recapitulate, working for oneself is definitely beneficial for young
people
Use synonyms
 because it enables them to
work
Use synonyms
 on their own terms;
however
Linking Words
, there are drawbacks
such
Linking Words
 as the lack of a guaranteed paycheck that need to be considered before choosing to be an entrepreneur.
Submitted by shraddhakasturi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: