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Band 4

Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are some good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #animals #zoos
The greatness of a nation can be
jugded
Correct your spelling
judged
 by how people treat the
animals
 of their country. Lots of stock believe that wild
animals
 should not kept in zoos.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 some
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
 that there are goods
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 having
Correct article usage
a zoo's
show examples
zoo's
Change the noun form
zoos
zoo
show examples
. As the extinction occurs rapidly, it is my opinion to protect the
animals
 by keeping them in
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
.
To begin
 with, zoos has many
advantage
Change to a plural noun
advantages
show examples
 associated with it . The main logic of
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
 is to conserve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
animals
 from bad human acts and nowadays, species are disappearing, so it is
Correct pronoun usage
our
show examples
responsibility to preserve them.
However
, some
beast
Fix the agreement mistake
beasts
show examples
 are dangerous for human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
, by keeping them in
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
 prevents many
accident
Change to a plural noun
accidents
show examples
.
Nevertheless
, they save energy as they
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
don't
need to
do
Verb problem
make
show examples
 efforts for food.
For instance
,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom (
Uk
Correct your spelling
UK
show examples
) shares the data of saving huge pandas by caring
them
Change preposition
for them
show examples
 in
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
.
Furthermore
,
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 obtain knowledge about all the exotic
animals
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 one place only and they do not need to travel
many
Change preposition
to many
show examples
spot
Change to a plural noun
spots
show examples
 to see them .
In addition
,
tourist
Add an article
a tourist
show examples
 from other nation comes to visit
zoo
Add an article
the zoo
a zoo
show examples
. Consider the example, in
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2013 Mysore
zoo
Capitalize word
Zoo
show examples
 -
special
Correct article usage
a special
show examples
zoo
 for exotic
animals
 was
Correct article usage
the
show examples
most visited place by
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
 other
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 visiting any destination.
On the contrary
, there are numerous drawbacks
also
 which can never be
neglect
Wrong verb form
neglected
show examples
The main
is
Correct pronoun usage
one is
show examples
animals
 are supposed to be not connected to nature but
also
, they are restricted to
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
 things
according to
 them.
Moreover
, they even
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
don't
 have enough space for roaming and
it's affects
Change the verb form
it affects
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 mental health. As
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
proof,
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
 in
meghalaya
Change the capitalization
Meghalaya
show examples
 are not really well preserved and developed, because of the humid weather of
meghalaya
Change the capitalization
Meghalaya
show examples
,
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 number of
animals
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
die daily as they are not able to survive in
such
 type of harsh
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
. In conclusion,
this
 essay
support
Change the verb form
supports
show examples
more
Add an article
the more
show examples
 positive influence of having
zoo
Add an article
a zoo
show examples
.
Animals
 should be protected in
zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos
show examples
, but the condition is behavior with them must be polite
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • captivity
  • natural habitat
  • artificial enclosures
  • genetic diversity
  • animal welfare
  • conservation efforts
  • endangered species
  • biodiversity
  • education platform
  • breeding programs
  • reintroduction
  • psychological suffering
What to do next:
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