People after retirement often require financial assistance. Some think the government should be responsible for this, while others believe individuals should make provisions for themselves. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #retirement #assistance #think #government #individuals #provisions

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People

Use synonyms

need financial

support

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after their

retirement

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. Some argued that authorities should take care of

this

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and others believe it is the individual who should think about it.

Although

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

taking care of the future is a personal responsibility, I believe that

government

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should financially

support

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them because they are their citizens. Securing money for the future is a personal matter.

This

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is to say that most of the individuals planned for their future which includes financial stability after

retirement

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and putting all on authorities could increase the strain on the financial budget.

As a result

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, it would be hard for the ministry bodies to work for the betterment of the public.

Therefore

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everyone should save money for the older time.

For example

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, in India, most

people

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save cash for their

retirement

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and public authorities could focus on other areas of development.

However

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, I believe that it is the council duty to take care of their

people

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. The country

government

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is responsible to give financial

support

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to citizens after their

retirement

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This

Linking Words

implies that all men and women are working for their country throughout their life and pay taxes to improve the economy of the nation.

Therefore

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, when they need

support

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, the authority should come forward to help them.

For instance

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, in Canada, after the age of 65, oldies are getting the fixed amount for their livelihood from the public bodies.

Therefore

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, I believe that the

government

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should take responsibility for their residents when they need it. In conclusion, after the job, individuals need funds on the regular basis. Despite the fact that

people

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should save money for their

retirement

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because it is their personal responsibility and it could rises the pressure on the budget, I believe that

government

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should come forward to pay after their job because they are civilians.

Submitted by sonamrohilla on Wed Aug 04 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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People after retirement often require financial assistance. Some think the government should be responsible for this, while others believe individuals should make provisions for themselves. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you gree or disgree?

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Universities and colleges are now offering courses through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?