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Band 7

some people believe that Pop stars certainly earn their money. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #pop #stars #money
Pop stars today enjoy a style of living that was once the right of Royalty. Some people argue that receiving an enormous size of
money
 as an income is completely unfair.
However
, I believe that pop stars earn the amount of
money
 they deserve as being a superstar has its own challenges as well as difficulties and require years of overwhelming
effort
.
To begin
 with, if they enjoy many of the privileges of Royalty, they certainly share many of the inconveniences as well.
For instance
, it is dangerous for them to make unscheduled appearances in public since they will encounter adoring crowds which idolize them.
In other words
, they are no longer private individuals but public property.
Therefore
, the financial rewards they receive for
this
 sacrifice should not be calculated as societies always are willing to admire their top entertainers lavishly. A
second
 rationale for approving the issue that famous ones is qualified for
such
 income is their huge endeavour. Actually, having made years of concentrated
effort
, gaining a great deal of
money
 should be justified as they may be rewarded with complete failure.
Thus
, there are hundreds of struggles they have to face so as to be a prominent person.
For example
, they know at the outset that only a handful of competitors ever get to the very top and, in turn, they must spend an enormous amount of time and
effort
 to achieve the enjoy of reputation. To encapsulate, it is conceivable that celebrities clearly merit a considerable amount of
money
. Having various challenges to deal with as well as requiring hard
effort
 to act as a well-known member of society are two of the key factors behind affirming
this
 argument.
Submitted by elhamhamidian on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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