Some people think that lawbreakers should be sent to prison. However, others think that better talents among those should be made to work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #lawbreakers #prison #talents #work

It is

heated

Correct article usage

a heated

show examples

controversy about whether the prisoner with better talents should be made to

work

. From my perspective, lawbreakers must be sentenced to jail,

although

some of them are talented in certain aspects of their

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

To begin

with, sentencing the lawbreakers to prison, only in

this

way, can ensure that the sufferer's rights not be violated again.

Moreover

, for espionage crimes, isolating them from the outside can keep the nation in a safer situation. The

criminals

should receive adequate punishment and realize their faults

Change preposition

for

show examples

committing a crime before being released to society.

Otherwise

, those wrongdoers with a criminal record could commit another crime habitually. Particularly, talented crimes can upgrade the modus operandi that increases the difficulty of catching them.

Nevertheless

criminals

with professional talents can be granted

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

specific

work

under imprisonment. They deserve penalties because of their misbehaviours and crimes despite their talents.

However

, it is reasonable to allow reformed

criminals

to contribute to society with their expertise and skills.

For instance

, the police can employ reformed frauds to assist them in detecting fraud cases with their experience. Another example,

reformed

Add a missing verb

is reformed

show examples

hackers can

work

for corporations to protect technology intelligence from being stolen by competitors.

In addition

, they can

work

for the military to defend

national

Change preposition

against national

show examples

hacking activities. In case these talented expirees are virtuous, they should be couraged to

work

and make good use of their profession. In conclusion,

criminals

should be

under

Change preposition

apply

show examples

imprisonment

Replace the word

imprisoned

show examples

because they deserve it. If someone with gifted expertise could leave the jail, it

Wrong verb form

would be

show examples

unequal to other prisoners and unfair to the sufferers.

Consequently

, lawbreakers with professions

also

need to be sentenced to prison as others.

Submitted by Steve Yan on Fri Aug 06 2021

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Task Response

Ensure that the essay directly addresses both views and presents a clear opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion

The overall logical structure is good, but ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly and cohesively.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that lawbreakers should be sent to prison. However, others think that better talents among those should be made to work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

2.It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

These days we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television and this is having a negative impact on children's beahaviour.do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.