IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In order to truly innovate, continued hard work is more important than intelligence. To what extent do you agree with this statement and why?

#work #intelligence
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Consistent hard
work
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 is considered
plays
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to play
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more
Correct article usage
a more
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 vital role in
innovation
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 in comparison to
intelligence
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.I partially agree with the above notion to a great extent and the reason for my partial agreement is discussed in the following paragraphs. On one side, the reason why hard
work
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 is given more preference than smart
work
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 when it comes to
innovation
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 is
because
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that
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innovation
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 requires multiple attempts of
certain
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the certain
a certain
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process
Fix the agreement mistake
processes
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 to reach the objective in which the
intelligence
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 of an innovator may not be that crucial.
In other words
Linking Words
,
innovation
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 is entirely transforming the existing product or technology in which a certain road map is followed by innovators . The planning may require too much
of
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apply
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intelligence
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,
however
Linking Words
, after a plan is designed the majority of
work
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 and the
achivability
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availability
achievability
 of success rely upon the uninterrupted and continues
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hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 of innovators. To exemplify, the plan and objective to introduce
a curved display smartphones
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a curved display smartphone
curved display smartphones
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was
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were
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 defined in
year
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the year
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 2016 which was just a 10% part of
innovation
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. The engineering team
on the other hand
Linking Words
, despite multiple fail
attempts
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,attempts
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 worked dedicatedly for 4 years to successfully develop its prototype in
year
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the year
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 2020.
Hence
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
intelligence
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 may play some initial role in
innovation
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, the
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 involved is certainly more important.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there might be some instances where the
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hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 becomes less essential than
intelligence
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 for innovations.
In other words
Linking Words
, there are few instances
such
Linking Words
 as the
innovation
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 of
existing
Correct article usage
the existing
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 covid-19 vaccine which could protect against
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
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 variants. There were inexperienced scientists involved in that
innovation
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 which did not bring any optimistic results despite their
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
,
however
Linking Words
, when replaced with more intelligent and experienced scientists, it did not take more than a month to
introduct
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introduce
 a vaccine named Covishield which was a
life saver
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lifesaver
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innovation
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 for India.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in certain
cases
Add a comma
,cases
show examples
 the
intelligence
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 becomes more important than worthless
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hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
. To conclude,
although
Linking Words
 the achievement of
innovation
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is heavily relies
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is heavily relied
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 upon the
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hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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intelligence
Use synonyms
 in few instances becomes more important than just working hard.
Submitted by ankit.hart on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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