Television injects violence in children, and programs with violent scenes should be banned. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#television #violence #children #programs #scenes

The majority of people believes that in today's era aggression level among kids has increased mainly due to television

programs

. I agree with the given statement to some extent ,television is not only the source of

violence

but

certainly

Add a comma

,certainly

show examples

there are other factors too.In the following paragraph with the relevant reasons, I will illustrate the same.

Initially

, a channel needs to secure approval from the censor board before any program is aired on a

. In case,

violence

Add an article

the violence

show examples

level is high, it needs to be modified to

acceptable

Add an article

an acceptable

show examples

degree. As school

children

are not competent enough to differentiate between right or wrong,

therefore

mostly they end up picking

dangerous

Add an article

a dangerous

show examples

side

Fix the agreement mistake

sides

show examples

Secondly

, it has been observed that the

children

always try to imitate action moves they watch on

shows.

For

instance

Add a comma

,instance

show examples

due to the recent live show of the

Word

Correct your spelling

World

show examples

Wrestling Championship in the region, the number

violent

Change preposition

of violent

show examples

activities were surge as

children

were indulged in replicating the fight moves viewed in the program.

In contrast

violence

existed even before the

was invented. In the United States,

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

juvenile punishment was established in the early 17th century , so

programs

are not the primary source of

violence

In addition

, it is often claimed that

children

do not enjoy watching

violence

programs

, they spent most of

the

Change the word

their

show examples

time with

cartoon

Fix the agreement mistake

cartoons

show examples

. According to the research by local authorities, youth mostly learn the violent activities from his immediate family.

Altenatively

Correct your spelling

Alternatively

, they claim that through the action

programs

on the

childrenhas

Correct your spelling

children has

children

developed the

martialarts

Correct your spelling

martial arts

martial-arts

skills without any mentorship. To elucidate, it is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high time to restrict the violent

programs

for

children

socensor

Correct your spelling

sensor

censor

board needs to define clear guidelines and rating needs to be explained to guardians so that they can brief about the content and minimize the impact of

suchprograms

Correct your spelling

such programs

Submitted by rahulbhajji on Sun Aug 08 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

303 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think are consumers influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Competing companies usually showcase abundant advertisements which can influence the consumers. In this essay, I will explore the influence of advertisements on individuals and also provide some measures to protect people.
5.5
band
The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the envirnonment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.
A lot of millennials are of the notion that higher authorities should shut down the factories that are generating huge amount of hazardous waste without proper channels for their disposal. I will shed the light on both the views and put forward my opinion on the same.
5
band
In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally . Why people buy imported food ? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?
In the modern world , many individuals opt for buying foreign food instead of local food production . The main reason is the high standard of them. However , this can be tackled by improving the quality of local food to attract consumers.
7
band
Some people believe today that everyone has a right to access to the Internet and that governments should provide this access for free. Other people believe that access to the internet is not a right and should be paid for like other services. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
As the Internet plays a vital role in modern society, it is inevitable for there to be debate over whether it should be provided for free. Some people consider the government should provide Internet access for free, while others believe it should be charged like other services. This essay aims to discuss both views, along with my agreement with the second opinion.
6.5
band
Should the use of animals in circuses be banned?do you agree or disagree
It is believed that using of animals in circuses should be prohibited. I completely agree with this notion because it is torturing animals and their place should be in nature, not circuses.

Television injects violence in children, and programs with violent scenes should be banned. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Fully explain your ideas

The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the envirnonment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally . Why people buy imported food ? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

Some people believe today that everyone has a right to access to the Internet and that governments should provide this access for free. Other people believe that access to the internet is not a right and should be paid for like other services. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Should the use of animals in circuses be banned?do you agree or disagree