Many animals species in the world are becoming extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protect these animals from dying out, while others say we should concentrate more on problems of human beings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#animals #species #world #people #countries #individuals #beings

Never has the topic concerning

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

protection of extinct

animals

failed to attract our

attention

However

, when it comes to whether protecting

animals

or paying

attention

to human beings,

people

hold divergent views. Some

people

are adamant that focusing on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public social issues is

beneficialprior

Correct your spelling

beneficial prior

animals

protection.From my perspective, the two views are mutually exclusive.

People

should protect endangered

animals

for the balance of

ecosystem

Add an article

the ecosystem

an ecosystem

show examples

First

and foremost, all kinds of

animals

play

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

different roles in the biological chain. If a type of

creatures

Fix the agreement mistake

creature

show examples

disappeared, the

quantity

Change the quantifier

number

show examples

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

show examples

natural enemies will increase, while the number of its predators would dramatically drop. Under

such

circumstances, the balance of

ecosystem

Correct article usage

the ecosystem

show examples

would be destroyed, which will influence the survival of other species or even human beings,

Thus

, in order to keep the balance of nature, countries and individuals should protect these

animals

, which are in danger of dying out.

Although

the view of protecting extinct

animals

is beneficial, opponents claim that governments should concentrate

Correct your spelling

show examples

human beings’ problems rather than

animals

.On top of the list,human beings are facing many more emergent problems. Nowadays, many

people

in impoverished areas still suffer diseases and wars , and their security can not be guaranteed.f countries use the money for

animals

to provide food, tents and shelters for their citizens, the public could live a better life.

In addition

, countries’ financial budget and individuals’

attention

are limited., if they focus on

animals

’ protection, the expenses of other infrastructures would decrease.

For example

, if the government cut down expenses on

health

Add an article

the health

show examples

care system, many impoverished

people

would not afford

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical care .

Thus

,they will be underrated, underappreciated, underprivileged, which is inclined to make the convicts revenge our society to express their resentment and dissatisfaction . To sum up, protecting endangered

animals

and paying

attention

to individuals are equally profitable to the world. Only by integrating both can

be enjoy

Change the verb form

enjoy

show examples

the pleasure rather than pressure.

Submitted by 20429517 on Sun Aug 08 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

320 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many animals species in the world are becoming extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protect these animals from dying out, while others say we should concentrate more on problems of human beings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some areas of the US, a curfew is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be outdoors after a particular time at night unless they are with an adult. What is your opinion about this?

Some people believe that children learn better when they are placed in classes with children of similar academic abilities. Others believe that children learn better when they are in classes with children representing a diverse range of academic abilities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic.

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people prefer to work on school projects with a group, while others would rather work alone. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?