IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people believe that money is the best gift for teenagers while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #money #gift #teenagers
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It often
agrue
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argue
agree
argues
 that giving
money
Use synonyms
 to
teenager
Use synonyms
 can spoil their habits. Gifts are
best
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the best
show examples
 way to fulfil their needs.
Opposite
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On opposite
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, some people are favouring of giving
money
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 to
Use synonyms
adolesence
Correct your spelling
adolescence
 to handle their own needs.
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Adolesence
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Adolescence
 is
crucial
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a crucial
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 time of
life
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 span, during
this
Linking Words
 period takes their
habbits
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habits
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throughout
show examples
through out
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throughout
show examples
 the
life
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. We would discuss merits and
demertis
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demerits
wheather
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whether
 gifts or pocket
money
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 is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 way for
teenager
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. On one hand, In
Use synonyms
adolesence
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adolescence
 period, it is time when children pass in young stage and gain
habbits
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habits
 which they carry through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
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. There are
a lots
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a lot
lots
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 of
cruosity
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curiosity
 in their mind, they think if some gift them
money
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 they can satisfy their
requirments
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requirements
.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
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adolesence
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adolescence
adolescents
 want to buy books to enhance their knowledge.
As a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 they would feel happy and confident.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Correct article usage
the other
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other hand
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
,
Money
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 gives them
freedom
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the freedom
show examples
 to
teenger
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teenager
teenagers
 to spent as they wish. In today's era,
Use synonyms
Add an article
a teenager
the teenager
show examples
teenager
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teenagers
show examples
 can indulge in bad habits like
consumption
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the consumption
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 of illegal drugs. It would not be
wise
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a wise
show examples
 decision to give them
money
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 since they can
easly
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easily
stuck
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be stuck
stick
show examples
 in
trap
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the trap
a trap
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 of drug
padelers
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paddlers
peddlers
. Consumption of
drug
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drugs
show examples
 can tarnish their
life
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. I conclude that limited
money
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 can be given to
Use synonyms
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
accordin
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according
 g to their
requirment
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requirement
requirements
 under the
supervison
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supervision
 of one's parents. They should monitor their spending habits and provide the
guidence
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guidance
 if they feel to do so.
Submitted by Gurmit on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial responsibility
  • budget
  • save
  • informed spending decisions
  • personal preferences
  • practical and efficient
  • unwanted or inappropriate gifts
  • impersonal
  • emotional value
  • thoughtfulness
  • personal consideration
  • wise financial decisions
  • frivolously
  • lasting memories and experiences
  • educational courses
  • hobby-related equipment
  • long-lasting positive impact
  • fostering interests and skills
What to do next:
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