IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

More and more people are moving to big cities these days. Discuss advantages and disadvantages of living in a large city.

#people #cities #city
The given topic is highly controversial.
However
 , If a glance is taken at the pros and of
this
 aspect , it is irrefutable to say there are numerous
people
 prefer from villages to big
cities
 So , I perceive that , it a lot of disadvantages rather than the advantages . I hereby give the following arguments to support myself. Commencing with
First
 and foremost point in the list of my knowledge is that , If Individual
prefer
Change the verb form
prefers
show examples
 from a rural
area
 to the urban
area
then
 they face a lot of problems
such
 as traffic jam , Increase the population in
cities
 and
also
 they fight each other because they need more space to live in the city . Apart from
this
 , if
people
 come to the city
then
 they can need more space after they need to change park to building's after that , they can not walk in parks and
also
 children can not play outdoor games and they face heath related problems .
this
 type of pros if
people
 move in
cities
 .
Furthermore
 , there are some advantages associated with it as well .
firstly
 , if
people
 came to
cities
then
 , they can get a lot of benefits ,
for example
 , they can get good transport and
also
 their children can study the best university , good hospitals and so on .
In addition
 to
this
 , they can know how to live in
cities
 and
also
 they know discipline because
on the other hand
 in a rural
area
 has no discipline and
any
Correct quantifier usage
no
show examples
 rules. After analyzing the matter it would be right to say that despite few advantages , many disadvantages offer rank higher . Though , they should live in villages and Government should bring all facilities in
cities
 So,
people
 can not move in an urban
area
 .
Submitted by manpkaur2019 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • metropolitan
  • infrastructure
  • cost of living
  • public transportation
  • pollution
  • congestion
  • social isolation
  • cultural amenities
  • job market
  • healthcare facilities
  • educational institutions
  • crime rate
What to do next:
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