Art and music are considered some of the fundamental elements of societies. Do you think art and music still have a place in today's modern world of technology? Should children spend more time learning art and music at school?

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Artistic and musical expressions are critical for the complete development of societies.

This

essay will discuss whether their place is still accountable in a modern world like ours and whether children should learn these arts in academic institutes. I believe

art

and

music

are still playing an essential role in our society.

Although

there might not be any more paintings to commission or compositions to display, artists and musicians are still at work but in different ways.

For example

, with the introduction of social media, a simple post can be a piece of

art

and thanks to the spreading of

music

tutorial videos, everyone can learn how to play an instrument. Their contribution to society is still valid, as many people benefit from these forms of recreation. Regarding the implementation of

art

and

music

classes in school, I believe it is a necessary intervention. Children should be taught more about these forms of conveying emotions and ideas, as they can

also

be therapeutic. To illustrate

this

, research conducted by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Oxford university shows that schools where students study

art

and

music

regularly

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

have the lowest rate of unruly behaviours and bullying.

Music

and

art

programs should become a more represented part of students' training. The arts are as necessary for humans today as in the past;

however

, methods and channels might have adjusted to our technologically advanced society.

In addition

, young students should learn arts in schools as part of their academic programs because it can benefit their social and educational growth.

Submitted by ylyneko1998 on Thu Aug 12 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Art and music are considered some of the fundamental elements of societies. Do you think art and music still have a place in today's modern world of technology? Should children spend more time learning art and music at school?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people who commit serious crimes, such as robbery or violent attacks should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many think that in today’s world it is very difficult for people to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Others, however, feel that it is easy for people to be healthy and fit if they want to be. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The most important consideration when choosing any career or job is having a high income. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‘It is the job of governments and companies to deal with the huge environmental problems which we face. Individuals on their own can do little or nothing’. What is your opinion about this statement?